Oct 06, 2004 22:14
I hate when its late at night and im left alone with my thoughs, it would be so much easier if i could turn off my head and not think about things. I hate emotional roller coasters, they make me mad. I can be completely happy one day, then completely sad the next, and i dont know how this happens. Im sick of everyone seeing something in me that i cant see myself. I want to be able to like who i am, and i dont know why its so hard for me to do that.
Senior pictures tomorrow. im not looking forward to it, most people know how much i hate EVERY SINGLE picture ever taken of me. I dont want to go and sit for an hour so i can try and pick out a picture of myself i want in the yearbook. Believe me i wont like a single one, so ill go with the one my mom chooses which will probably be the worst one anyways.
Thank god the weekend is coming up. Ill be sober the whole time but im hoping i will find another sober person at Tori's party to chat with so i can still have a good time. I need to learn how to have fun without drinking. Either way ill deal with the cops if they come which will be grand, but somones gotta do it.
If i could figure out how to upload pictures on to a post i would show you some of my favorite pictures from everett but im ratarded so i cant. which might be a good thing depending on how much interest you have in photography.
Either way im going to bed right now, im exhausted and not ready to start another mundane day.