(no subject)
So im not sure about these drunken football game things. Im sure every kid in my AP spanish class is completely frightened off me, im going to have to apologize to so many people on monday. Wait actually im sure half the student body is completely frightened of me. I was insane, i just kept telling people i was "hyper and spirited" but no one bought it because im never hyper and im never spirited. I even talked to my little sisters friends and her ex boyfriend and they totally knew, i mean how could you not? Shit it was bad, but at least i got that experience taken care of, so now i can actually say i was at a football game drunk one time.
So same old story but i loooove hanging out with new people, i mean although they were people i already knew it seemed i got to know them on a different level then i had known them before. A few i see every once in awhile and say hi to but we never hung out with, and one i used to hang out with but never really got to know deeper then the surface, and he is such an amazing guy. I never thought i would meet a guy my own age who had been in boy scouts or was in eagle scouts at the time being. I know its lame but i think thats to coolest thing ever, and i dont even care if i sound retarded. I have always wanted someone who knew a lot about nature and hiking and camping and star watching, i think thats incredible. My dad did it when he was young and he knows a lot, i think its totally cool when people do that. Ah anyways im going to quit ranting, all i know is that im deffinatly hanging out with him again sometime soon so we can have more awesome conversations. I just wish i could see him as more then a friend.... but i cant.
I wish you knew how i felt! I wish i could tell you without you laughing in my face or making me feel rediculous. I wish i could just talk to you, but im too fucked up to make anything work ever.
p.s. i look like a fucking crack whore, i shouldnt drink in public, im hella nasty. Im going to have a wicked hangover tomorrow and im playing an hour and a half soccer game, bravo for me. (yeah i just said wicked, get over it)