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Who knew that a few posts about Creepy Photoshop Lady would provide so many entries of pure entertainment? Not I. And now...
TWO PEOPLE HAVE KICKED THE ASS OF EVERYTHING FOR ME!
Heh.
Life, it keeps getting better.
Part One:
A few months ago Lovely Wife Sara convinced me to watch a movie she loved as a child that had just come out on DVD, a movie called Savannah Smiles. I asked Geoff at That's Rentertainment -- best video store EVAR -- if he was getting it in, and he said he would call me when it arrived.
He did, we watched it, and I cried like a little girl at this children's movie about bank robbers who accidentally kidnap the Cutest Child Ever.
Anyway, when the tears ended, I took a photo of myself. If you think this is bad, you should see how ugly I am when I'm actually in the process of crying:
Yesterday Belgian artist
grafunkel was inspired by the last few days worth of photos and did me up right proper-like.
"I couldn't get you to smile... but consider that a poutyface, then."
And if you missed it, you'd better see what
pyrotech_c3h8 did for me at the same time, complete independently.
PART TWO:
---------
"Well Ben, thanks to your post about photo retouching services, I decided to try my hand at it, and I think mine came out pretty well. I thought it only fitting that I take a picture of you for inspiration!
First, I started with this picture
I thought I could even it out a bit and I was pretty pleased with the results. Now THIS is the type of picture you mail home to your parents in a Christmas card motherfuckers!"
First off, I evened out your skin tones because nothing says "Natural Beauty" quite like a monocromatic face lacking pores. I also added some eyes that were a little more attentive as you almost never open your eyes completely and it doesn't look quite as good as the "Perpetually surprised/assraped" style I replaced them with.
Next I made your hair a little more respectably combed. Really now Ben, what's up with the crazy spikedy thing? Don't you think this looks much better?
I also gave you a far more respectable and pointy moustache. Between you and I, I've always felt your facial hair was a bit understated and sparse. This new stache DEMANDS attention. I also think your glasses are a bit dated, so I got you some Emo style frames. Just a word of warning though, don't show this picture to any young ladies unless you are wearing galoshes, cuz I guarantee the sexiness of it all will make the room absolutely dripping wet with female arousal.
Finally, I replaced all those faggy Christmas wrappers with something far more manly and deserving of a thumbs up...A BIG ASS GUN.
No need to thank me.
------------
Now jump on their LJ's like they're sweet, round, perfect booties with the word TAP tattooed on one cheek and ME on the other.
Smooches,
b
PS - Special thanks to
wigu, without whom none of this would have been possible. He probably would like you to mail him some beer.
TWO PEOPLE HAVE KICKED THE ASS OF EVERYTHING FOR ME!
Heh.
Life, it keeps getting better.
Part One:
A few months ago Lovely Wife Sara convinced me to watch a movie she loved as a child that had just come out on DVD, a movie called Savannah Smiles. I asked Geoff at That's Rentertainment -- best video store EVAR -- if he was getting it in, and he said he would call me when it arrived.
He did, we watched it, and I cried like a little girl at this children's movie about bank robbers who accidentally kidnap the Cutest Child Ever.
Anyway, when the tears ended, I took a photo of myself. If you think this is bad, you should see how ugly I am when I'm actually in the process of crying:
Yesterday Belgian artist
grafunkel was inspired by the last few days worth of photos and did me up right proper-like.
"I couldn't get you to smile... but consider that a poutyface, then."
And if you missed it, you'd better see what
pyrotech_c3h8 did for me at the same time, complete independently.
PART TWO:
---------
"Well Ben, thanks to your post about photo retouching services, I decided to try my hand at it, and I think mine came out pretty well. I thought it only fitting that I take a picture of you for inspiration!
First, I started with this picture
I thought I could even it out a bit and I was pretty pleased with the results. Now THIS is the type of picture you mail home to your parents in a Christmas card motherfuckers!"
First off, I evened out your skin tones because nothing says "Natural Beauty" quite like a monocromatic face lacking pores. I also added some eyes that were a little more attentive as you almost never open your eyes completely and it doesn't look quite as good as the "Perpetually surprised/assraped" style I replaced them with.
Next I made your hair a little more respectably combed. Really now Ben, what's up with the crazy spikedy thing? Don't you think this looks much better?
I also gave you a far more respectable and pointy moustache. Between you and I, I've always felt your facial hair was a bit understated and sparse. This new stache DEMANDS attention. I also think your glasses are a bit dated, so I got you some Emo style frames. Just a word of warning though, don't show this picture to any young ladies unless you are wearing galoshes, cuz I guarantee the sexiness of it all will make the room absolutely dripping wet with female arousal.
Finally, I replaced all those faggy Christmas wrappers with something far more manly and deserving of a thumbs up...A BIG ASS GUN.
No need to thank me.
------------
Now jump on their LJ's like they're sweet, round, perfect booties with the word TAP tattooed on one cheek and ME on the other.
Smooches,
b
PS - Special thanks to
wigu, without whom none of this would have been possible. He probably would like you to mail him some beer.