Reflection

[benarian]

A year ago I moved out of my living space on Indianola. After arguing with Amity about accepting responsibility for having cheated on me, betraying me and lying to me I finally felt enough resolve and anger to do what was right for me instead of what I felt was right for us. I knew that moving seperately would ulitimately be the death toll for our marriage, but I could not fight for it any longer when she was so obviously not willing to put forth any effort into either saving our relationship or ending it herself. The following months would be the most difficult I have lived through in my life. I received a tremendous amount of support from my friends and family during this time. Everything from helping me move my crap to distractions from my situation.

I am still not happy with the way that things went, but in the end I am happier now than I was. I have a car, a better paying job and I feel much better than I did. I have lost weight (and kept it off). I have received treatment (ongoing) for depression. I have maintained relationships with my friends, and in many cases have now stronger relationships with them than I did before. I have a greater depth of appreciation for my family. I have even felt good enough to begin dating again and having a wonderful time doing so.

I have remained true to my self. I have improved. My life has improved.

I think its about time to throw a kick-ass party.