my dirty little secrets
i worry that the naked photographs i sent to my girlfriend will resurface if i ever become president.
i don't like concerts because i feel as if the lead singer is going to pull me up on stage and embarass the fuck out of me.
i have an older sister that's fifteen years older than me, and my dad has no idea.
when i sit on my real father's grave, i want to dig him up just to see what he looks like.
but the dirtiest secret i have, is that i lost my virginity to a travelling cookie salesman, because of an irrational fear that he was going to rape me if i didn't buy any of his cookies, and i had no money.
i don't like concerts because i feel as if the lead singer is going to pull me up on stage and embarass the fuck out of me.
i have an older sister that's fifteen years older than me, and my dad has no idea.
when i sit on my real father's grave, i want to dig him up just to see what he looks like.
but the dirtiest secret i have, is that i lost my virginity to a travelling cookie salesman, because of an irrational fear that he was going to rape me if i didn't buy any of his cookies, and i had no money.