My Nightmare
Last night I had a nightmare, the first one I had in a long time. I woke up feeling really edgy and stressed, so I put the CD Scott made me on. Its nice. I think I am dehydrated because I never pee anymore. I used to pee a lot.
Sorry. I am weird.
Today I don't have class so I was thinking about doing lots of chores. Getting stuff done. My room is already really clean. Hehe, I am so crazy when I have caffiene.
For some reason I feel kinda down right now. I feel like perhaps I might be thinking too much. It would thus be a good idea to excercise and meditate....
Its been a REALLY long time since I have liked someone how I like Scott. And I am not saying that to be cute. He makes me very happy, and its to the point where I feel strongly, and almost a sense of commitment even though there is no formal one. He seems perfect for me, but is it really perfect if its so far away? When I mentioned him to my therapist she said, well what would you do if you found the perfect person right now? I said I would be very happy. And she made the point that most people wouldn't be able to handle it. AndI am thinking that I am not one of those people. Its like a subtle kind of perfection. I was talking to Lashara about this yesterday, But I feel like I wouldn't go out with someone I couldn't see myself marrying. Not cause I am like all about marriage, but because if there are set limitations to what you could be then why get involved? To fulfil a certain limit, and then move on, saying you always knew it wouldn't work.... Doesn't make sense to me.
I have been up for an hour without eating or peeing.
Apparently all I need to live is the internet.
Ugh.
I am feeling lost. Give me some direction
Sorry. I am weird.
Today I don't have class so I was thinking about doing lots of chores. Getting stuff done. My room is already really clean. Hehe, I am so crazy when I have caffiene.
For some reason I feel kinda down right now. I feel like perhaps I might be thinking too much. It would thus be a good idea to excercise and meditate....
Its been a REALLY long time since I have liked someone how I like Scott. And I am not saying that to be cute. He makes me very happy, and its to the point where I feel strongly, and almost a sense of commitment even though there is no formal one. He seems perfect for me, but is it really perfect if its so far away? When I mentioned him to my therapist she said, well what would you do if you found the perfect person right now? I said I would be very happy. And she made the point that most people wouldn't be able to handle it. AndI am thinking that I am not one of those people. Its like a subtle kind of perfection. I was talking to Lashara about this yesterday, But I feel like I wouldn't go out with someone I couldn't see myself marrying. Not cause I am like all about marriage, but because if there are set limitations to what you could be then why get involved? To fulfil a certain limit, and then move on, saying you always knew it wouldn't work.... Doesn't make sense to me.
I have been up for an hour without eating or peeing.
Apparently all I need to live is the internet.
Ugh.
I am feeling lost. Give me some direction