The real folk blues
So as I sit in my kitchen typing this, I have a mixture of emotions fluttering through me. Last night was a blast, I finally was able to let loose and have a great time with my friends. Round after round of beer pong (or in my case smirnoff pong) I am reminded why I love these people so much.
So today, my Mom and I got into another argument (surprise surprise) and I can't even tell you what it was about. All I know is that I snipped at her a couple of times because I have absolutely no patience with her anymore. It makes me feel really aweful too because I understand what she's going through. Her mom just got over cancer and now my Dad has it, so I get it, she's under alot of stress and pressure, but she still loves to pick arguments with me. Maybe she's just looking for someone to talk to or vent to. I know that people say you lash out those who are close to you, but I can't take it anymore. It's just built up, so when she asks me a million god damn questions that I don't feel like answering, I can't help yelling at her. This probably makes we sound like a major bitch, but the woman threw a shoe at my head the other day!
So anywho, my neighbor Karen comes over to talk to me because my Mom stomped off over there and we talked for about 30 minutes and she said somehing that made my heart sink. I don't know if she was just saying this or if my parents are just keeping this from me, but she said that my Dad only has "about 5 years left". I wish that parents could just be up front with me about this whole situation. I want to know whether or not my Dad is going to be there when I graduate college and to walk me down the aisle or see his future grandkids. It's just that I haven't had this weird or eerie feeling about this whole situation and my intincts are usually right. I don't even know what to think.
So today, my Mom and I got into another argument (surprise surprise) and I can't even tell you what it was about. All I know is that I snipped at her a couple of times because I have absolutely no patience with her anymore. It makes me feel really aweful too because I understand what she's going through. Her mom just got over cancer and now my Dad has it, so I get it, she's under alot of stress and pressure, but she still loves to pick arguments with me. Maybe she's just looking for someone to talk to or vent to. I know that people say you lash out those who are close to you, but I can't take it anymore. It's just built up, so when she asks me a million god damn questions that I don't feel like answering, I can't help yelling at her. This probably makes we sound like a major bitch, but the woman threw a shoe at my head the other day!
So anywho, my neighbor Karen comes over to talk to me because my Mom stomped off over there and we talked for about 30 minutes and she said somehing that made my heart sink. I don't know if she was just saying this or if my parents are just keeping this from me, but she said that my Dad only has "about 5 years left". I wish that parents could just be up front with me about this whole situation. I want to know whether or not my Dad is going to be there when I graduate college and to walk me down the aisle or see his future grandkids. It's just that I haven't had this weird or eerie feeling about this whole situation and my intincts are usually right. I don't even know what to think.