(no subject)
my biggest fear is loosing everyone i love...
not actual death but just loosing them
forgetting about me
it seems like that is happening right now.
I am not asking for much and i am truly thankful for what i have
a healthy beautiful son, a great man
I just want to feel wanted feel like i am important
to someone i want to be able to do things for myself
why is that so hard to acomplish for me?
why am i stuck in reverse?
when will it be my turn to win ANYTHING?
to succeed?
why can't i be my own best friend just like i was a few years ago?
why do i have to depend on others to bring me happiness
and most of all why the fuck am i crying right now?
why do i stay up so late?
why cant i fucking evolve into the butterfly that i want to be?
what happened erika viramontes? what happened to you?
please dont tell me that you are falling back wards?
are you?
its time
but how?
how do i do it?
DAY 2 without chiefing
and for what i am not going to get it.
i should take a big fat rip to the fucking head right now.
not actual death but just loosing them
forgetting about me
it seems like that is happening right now.
I am not asking for much and i am truly thankful for what i have
a healthy beautiful son, a great man
I just want to feel wanted feel like i am important
to someone i want to be able to do things for myself
why is that so hard to acomplish for me?
why am i stuck in reverse?
when will it be my turn to win ANYTHING?
to succeed?
why can't i be my own best friend just like i was a few years ago?
why do i have to depend on others to bring me happiness
and most of all why the fuck am i crying right now?
why do i stay up so late?
why cant i fucking evolve into the butterfly that i want to be?
what happened erika viramontes? what happened to you?
please dont tell me that you are falling back wards?
are you?
its time
but how?
how do i do it?
DAY 2 without chiefing
and for what i am not going to get it.
i should take a big fat rip to the fucking head right now.