(no subject)

[belly_botton]

i am going crazy.
the other day i had a conversation with an abercrombie bag
nothing was said back
but i talked to that girls face
and she held me with her eyes

I swear.
Last night i thought i called a friend and talked
it turns out that really it was all in my head
i thought that i had talked to her
and told her what was wrong
she told me i would be fine
and she told me to be happy
and i was_____ then

I love.
i cut myself again
i didnt want to
i sat and waited for someone to walk in
someone to talk to me to take my mind off the ache
no one came
i was alone again in my room
and the pain felt like and old freind that had come to help

Why?
i wonder why i stay where i am
i kno that i deserve better
but i refuse to move
i sit and stew about things that i shouldnt have to
i wait for the day when i will be satisfied
but that day doesnt come
i fear it will never come
and i will wake one morning knowing that the world has passed me by
and it will be too late to save what will be my life

And i cry.