this music does not fit my mood.
sometimes when i get bored i go back to my old journal and read all the entries from the last few weeks of school and when i was in california.
i used to be so fun and cute. honestly, what happened? why am i so bland... so god damn boring now?
i loved my friends to death and constantly talked to them. you could actually tell that my best friend was, infact, my best friend.
i really fucking hate how things like this happen. and i hope that it's not because of the whole high school ordeal. people say that you change, and i always thought that it wouldn't happen to me. i'm not so sure anymore.
i miss my old journal and all the memories in it. i think that's why i never got around to deleting it. i just wish i could go back to this past summer. it was, hands down, the best summer i've ever had. that whole week i spent with kylie before i left. that whole month i spent with rini. that half sad/half ecstatic feeling i had when i got home. picking up kylie on our way from the airport because i missed her that much.
i miss my skirts and spending all my money at urban outfitters and how fucking hot it got and how we had to be in school until the end of july.
yeah, i even miss how i lost my two best friends since 5th grade and i even miss all of those times he let me down. i miss every bad thing that happened, because how can you have good times without bad?
i don't talk to anyone anymore. the other day derrick and josh imed me and i thought "why are they talking to me?" well... they used to be some of your closest friends, alyssa. maybe that's why?
no one really seems to give a fuck anymore, including myself, and it's really bringing me down.
i used to be so fun and cute. honestly, what happened? why am i so bland... so god damn boring now?
i loved my friends to death and constantly talked to them. you could actually tell that my best friend was, infact, my best friend.
i really fucking hate how things like this happen. and i hope that it's not because of the whole high school ordeal. people say that you change, and i always thought that it wouldn't happen to me. i'm not so sure anymore.
i miss my old journal and all the memories in it. i think that's why i never got around to deleting it. i just wish i could go back to this past summer. it was, hands down, the best summer i've ever had. that whole week i spent with kylie before i left. that whole month i spent with rini. that half sad/half ecstatic feeling i had when i got home. picking up kylie on our way from the airport because i missed her that much.
i miss my skirts and spending all my money at urban outfitters and how fucking hot it got and how we had to be in school until the end of july.
yeah, i even miss how i lost my two best friends since 5th grade and i even miss all of those times he let me down. i miss every bad thing that happened, because how can you have good times without bad?
i don't talk to anyone anymore. the other day derrick and josh imed me and i thought "why are they talking to me?" well... they used to be some of your closest friends, alyssa. maybe that's why?
no one really seems to give a fuck anymore, including myself, and it's really bringing me down.