Sappy Bag Lady Shit

[bellarenna]

O.K., you know how they say that there are different stages of pain. Well, I'm now at the sobbing my eyeballs out and wanting to end it all point. I love him, I do! So god damn much, and I can't understand why he can't just not be so fucking angry all the time. I want my angel back that I met and fell in love with. I know that there is things I need to work on and out of my life, but I'm scared. It's just that. I'm scared. My anxiety robs me of having a fullfilling life. I've tried to overcome it, and just take my medication. But, I'm not feeling better. Why??? Why can't anyone just be happy with me? Why does everyone want to change me? Everytime that happens I freak out and start to feel trapped. The only time I ever remember being truely happy, was when I was myself. I think by the time I'm done with this entry I will be electricuted from all the tears and snot that's falling onto the keyboard! Well my heart is offically broken. I miss the smell of his skin, and when I use to snuggle into his neck and feel his heart beat on my face. I miss that sooooo fucking much! God, I miss that.

The Unhappiest, Unhappy
Princess Misty, blah blah blah!