So Vain
I feel silly saying this, but for the first time in my life, I'm starting to feel that I'm approaching being a little bit pretty. Notice all the qualifiers, because I don't feel like I'm anywhere near pretty or beautiful or gorgeous. Just somewhere within shouting distance.
You'd think this bit of confidence would have come during the school year, when I had Heather telling me she was jealous of my boobs and attempting to pound it into my brain that I was beautiful; Casey, Emily and Rhiannon always telling me how cute I looked; and Michael, who was first attracted enough to want to date me and then attracted enough to continue doing so (slutty Black Tie dress, anyone?), but I guess not. I'm away from everyone now, and the only person I can ask if I look okay-and the only person I've ever trusted to tell the truth anyway-is myself.
I guess it's understandable, though, that I didn't feel all that hot about myself when I was always a few steps away from a size zero, half-Taiwanese bombshell.
I'm so tired. For some reason I haven't been able to get to sleep at night, despite being awake for 20+ hours and only sleeping for four for three days now. I'd have thought the running would have helped last night, but no dice.
That communication error I was ranting about the other day still hasn't been solved; she has yet to get back to me. I could wring her neck!
Thursday morning draws ever closer. I guess the upside is that I'll have some pretty sweet "sexy librarian" glasses when it's all over and done with, even if the downside will most likely be having to wear said glasses all the time.
I was going to go biking after church, but it's been raining hard off and on all day. It wouldn't be the most intelligent thing to go riding a bike I'm not very familiar with around an extremely hilly neighborhood right after rain or while it's raining, so I guess it'll have to wait for another day. Running resumes tomorrow, though, rain or shine. I have a schedule, and I intend to stick to it.
House with Lexi will save the day!
You'd think this bit of confidence would have come during the school year, when I had Heather telling me she was jealous of my boobs and attempting to pound it into my brain that I was beautiful; Casey, Emily and Rhiannon always telling me how cute I looked; and Michael, who was first attracted enough to want to date me and then attracted enough to continue doing so (slutty Black Tie dress, anyone?), but I guess not. I'm away from everyone now, and the only person I can ask if I look okay-and the only person I've ever trusted to tell the truth anyway-is myself.
I guess it's understandable, though, that I didn't feel all that hot about myself when I was always a few steps away from a size zero, half-Taiwanese bombshell.
I'm so tired. For some reason I haven't been able to get to sleep at night, despite being awake for 20+ hours and only sleeping for four for three days now. I'd have thought the running would have helped last night, but no dice.
That communication error I was ranting about the other day still hasn't been solved; she has yet to get back to me. I could wring her neck!
Thursday morning draws ever closer. I guess the upside is that I'll have some pretty sweet "sexy librarian" glasses when it's all over and done with, even if the downside will most likely be having to wear said glasses all the time.
I was going to go biking after church, but it's been raining hard off and on all day. It wouldn't be the most intelligent thing to go riding a bike I'm not very familiar with around an extremely hilly neighborhood right after rain or while it's raining, so I guess it'll have to wait for another day. Running resumes tomorrow, though, rain or shine. I have a schedule, and I intend to stick to it.
House with Lexi will save the day!