random: how I shield from negative energy / processing vs support / finding people who click w you

[belenen]

on shielding

Comments

[belenen]

You are most welcome! I definitely understand that feeling of exhaustion: when I am around people who are not good at managing their emotions, I get so weary it's ridiculous. My biofamily is bad for me in that way. I wish I'd remember to shield more around them! most of my friends are safe so I forget what it is like to need to shield.

You are so sweet! I am glad to have you in my life as well.

[hands_cupped]

"n finding people who will click with you in a meaningful way:
As you develop, the person who would fit with you changes, so a person who fits with you today won't fit anymore in three months unless you are at a stable place in your life or they happen to be growing in similar/compatible ways.

How to find them? my best luck has been them coming into my life as a result of being very open and honest. All the best people in my life came in for that reason. I initiated so few of my connections, or if I did initiate, it was in such small ways. (most things I initiate seem to fail, yet I keep trying -- hopefully I will learn the trick of it!) I imagine that whatever value or quality you most want in a partner, radiate that as much as you can, and they will come to you."I struggle a lot with this, lately. Reading this is interesting and helpful. I have a lot of trouble getting things to "click" when I try to initiate, too. I'm really not sure why this is, in my case, though I can think of a few possibilities (perhaps I am not being as

[belenen]

For years I have been trying to figure out why I have so little luck with initiating, but I am baffled! Thanks for the luck in figuring it out ;-)

[contrabandits]

I love your approach to "shielding." I, like you, do not like to close myself off to new emotional and spiritual experiences and therefore open myself to a lot of "noise." you've inspired me to be more mindful of how that might affect my mood and how I relate with others with that being considered. Thank you :)

[belenen]

thank you! I am very glad this was helpful to you :)

Past shielding

[raidingparty]

I'm not sure if you're familiar with this concept, so I thought I'd describe it:
My mum has suggested a style of shielding that ends up repairing past traumas. You briefly imagine the scene, whatever they said or the thoughts you had, and re-interpret it as energy (acid? lightning? snot?). Then you come up with a shield that diffuses that kind of energy. Replay from lesser to greater intensity until you can see the whole thing in detail with no damage to your bubble.
Then when you come back to present, you've changed the past so the present feels different.

Re: Past shielding

[belenen]

very interesting! I've done a similar thing in therapy before, not with the shielding in the past but with imagining truth spoken to the lie in the scene. That seems an even better method, thanks for sharing!