openness and privacy / poll: how much can I talk about you?
For years I associated almost-exclusively with people who had a similar view toward privacy -- considering it a hindrance to openness and actively dismantling it. It has been so odd for me to begin interacting regularly with people who preferred or were forced into privacy, or whose stance on the subject was unknown to me. When unknown, I really am not sure how to behave -- my instinct is to talk about them like I do about strangers and close friends, as that would clearly be the most open route. But I don't know how they'd react and haven't wanted to go to each of them individually and ask (laziness? fear that they would be put off by what I had to say? the awkwardness of saying to a near-stranger "I want to talk about you"? esp. when that doesn't necessarily mean I also want to talk TO you?). By default I've ended up saying very little, which bothers me because now my journal is missing first impressions and the development of those sprouting friendships. Which have been a huge part of my life!
So I'm making a poll, via screened comments (anonymous is on so that non-LJ-ers can answer, just tell me your name). No response defaults you to my discretion, which means that unless I would want privacy on it myself (and I can't think of much that fits that category), I'll say it publicly. (unless you've specifically asked me for privacy on something -- then of course I won't share it)
your privacy level:
1) don't talk about me at all.
2) email me a copy of what you want to post about me and let me decide how public it will be or if I want you to leave bits out.
3) friends-lock all you say about me.
4) don't talk about these specific things: _________________________ in relation to me.
5) friends-lock mentions of these specific things: _________________________ in relation to me.
6) use a pseudonym and say whatever you want, however you want.
7) just say whatever you want, however you want.