these feelings won't go away...
Not sure if you'll be able to see this, but this video absolutely breaks my heart. Some of you may remember the Rachel I spoke of here and here... in case you can't see the video, it's of zir dancing. I just sent zir a message saying "...I saw the video of you dancing to Citizen Cope's "Sideways" and it has haunted me ever since. Something about the rawness of your dancing just spoke to me in a way I can't really articulate... It made me cry and filled me with this intense longing. The way you communicate with dance is profoundly beautiful... heart-wrenching. I just had to tell you because I couldn't get it off my mind."
Have you ever met someone and just felt, at the deepest level, that you could understand them through and through? I don't even necessarily think that ze would understand me, but I feel like I would understand zir. It's completely different than any other connection I've felt... I don't even know what to call it. I don't think ze and I are on the same path at all, but still... just like ten years ago, the things that ze says without speaking pierce me to the core. It took quite a lot for me to send that... I wasn't even going to try to contact zir but I just kept being drawn back to that video until I sent a message.