shitty moment filled, yet not a bad day
i was sitting here thinking back on what an average day this had been. i overslept (surprise, surprise), did some cleaning, took a shower, went to see my best friend in the hospital (she's much better now, they just wanna keep her there till she can hold down more food), and went to work. the night went smoothly and (more importantly) quickly. so it was nothing special, but nothing terribly bad.
but there was the screaming fight with my mother (again: surprise, surprise), the not being able to help a friend when he so badly needed me, the phone call i 'knew' i'd be getting yet never did, the trouble with my animals and money.... again, the usual. yet, all in all, i sit here rather calm and content. i don't know why. maybe i've just gotten used to the extreme highs and lows my days bring anymore and now they don't fuck with me as much as they used to. to the special people in my "friends" log who have had shittier days than i, i love you so much more than you will ever know. you know my cell number. what can i do to help make this easier? i can light a candle. i can whisper a prayer. i can give a hug. i can talk. i can be silent and listen. if in any small way i can help bear your burden please let me.
i really don't know what else to say. i can usually type for hours about anything and everything.. but i am at a loss as of late. my days are bland. if it weren't for the fact that i'd get fired i don't think i'd care to get out of bed tomorrow. but again, things aren't bad for me! i just can't shake this... this dread...
but there was the screaming fight with my mother (again: surprise, surprise), the not being able to help a friend when he so badly needed me, the phone call i 'knew' i'd be getting yet never did, the trouble with my animals and money.... again, the usual. yet, all in all, i sit here rather calm and content. i don't know why. maybe i've just gotten used to the extreme highs and lows my days bring anymore and now they don't fuck with me as much as they used to. to the special people in my "friends" log who have had shittier days than i, i love you so much more than you will ever know. you know my cell number. what can i do to help make this easier? i can light a candle. i can whisper a prayer. i can give a hug. i can talk. i can be silent and listen. if in any small way i can help bear your burden please let me.
i really don't know what else to say. i can usually type for hours about anything and everything.. but i am at a loss as of late. my days are bland. if it weren't for the fact that i'd get fired i don't think i'd care to get out of bed tomorrow. but again, things aren't bad for me! i just can't shake this... this dread...