about a boy
so I've met a boy, well it's a boy I knew before, and a boy I liked before, but things when weird, don't know how, but thye just went weird, we didn't talk for almost 2 months, and now we are talking, the scary thing is, i hung out with him the other night, and he asked me if we were on a date... and to be honest, i'm not sure, I of course jokingly to friends when I told them about the situation I had gotten myself into I said I have a "date" with a boy... but I didn't actually think it was one... I just don't know....
so me... going to the same person I always go to when I finally just break down and don't know where to turn, but I know will be there for me no matter what.... talked to him about the boy I might actually like... ok ok... I do kinda like him.... but that is besides the point... anyways, my friend told me that I needed to open up and just take chances, I have two roads to go down, but I just need to choice the one that life is pointing me in right now....
but I don't know that road to go down, I' haven't really ever been down that road, and when I have they have all been assholes and jerks, and treated me like shit... hell I'm fuckin scared, I don't know what to do, and I've heard so many bad things about him, and it makes me nervous, but at the same time I really like him and I think he's a great guy and he makes me smile and laugh and that's what I love in a guy, but because of all this stuff that I've been told, I'm confused on what to do, because all I can think about is all the negative things that could possibly come out of this whole situation, and yea, he didn't call me for a while and whatever the reasons are there, there and yea something did change over that time, but I just don't like not know, because to quiet frank, i'm not sure if I want to know if he really likes me or not, because that would change everything, and I'm scared to death of that change..... this is why I'm always the best friend of the big/lil sister to guys, it's because I don't get myself into situations like this.. it's because then when I'm the best friend or the big/lil sis, then I know that the only feelings i'm going to get are love/friendship feelings........ that's the way it's always been before, and to be quiet frank that's probably the way it's always going to be...
I just don't know....
so me... going to the same person I always go to when I finally just break down and don't know where to turn, but I know will be there for me no matter what.... talked to him about the boy I might actually like... ok ok... I do kinda like him.... but that is besides the point... anyways, my friend told me that I needed to open up and just take chances, I have two roads to go down, but I just need to choice the one that life is pointing me in right now....
but I don't know that road to go down, I' haven't really ever been down that road, and when I have they have all been assholes and jerks, and treated me like shit... hell I'm fuckin scared, I don't know what to do, and I've heard so many bad things about him, and it makes me nervous, but at the same time I really like him and I think he's a great guy and he makes me smile and laugh and that's what I love in a guy, but because of all this stuff that I've been told, I'm confused on what to do, because all I can think about is all the negative things that could possibly come out of this whole situation, and yea, he didn't call me for a while and whatever the reasons are there, there and yea something did change over that time, but I just don't like not know, because to quiet frank, i'm not sure if I want to know if he really likes me or not, because that would change everything, and I'm scared to death of that change..... this is why I'm always the best friend of the big/lil sister to guys, it's because I don't get myself into situations like this.. it's because then when I'm the best friend or the big/lil sis, then I know that the only feelings i'm going to get are love/friendship feelings........ that's the way it's always been before, and to be quiet frank that's probably the way it's always going to be...
I just don't know....