Comments | behnd_blueyes: First we take Manhattan - [Gym, Quarters]

behnd_blueyes

First we take Manhattan - [Gym, Quarters] - [Kirk, McCoy]

Apr 16, 2010 11:33

It was a few days before Kirk woke up without a bone-deep fatigue that didn't stop him from enjoying the now-regular--though far from routine--sex he and McCoy had fallen into but hadn't allowed for much else. He ate a lot. He used the weights that McCoy had had sent there. The sofa remained tucked away in its primary shape, and neither mentioned ( Read more... )

easy for me to bleed on

Comments 122

sharpestscalpel April 16 2010, 18:56:55 UTC

Kirk could fuck things up for him. Would fuck things up for himself in the process, even if the kid didn't see it, but McCoy would still be fucked and he didn't take kindly to that goddamn idea. So he watched and he waited for some sign but Kirk was handling things better than maybe he ought to be.

Keeping him tired the fuck out was one strategy - and it had the benefit of keeping McCoy satisfied, too. He wasn't going to damn well lie to himself on that one. And Jos was going to love it - Kirk was pretty when he was desperate for it.

Not pretty enough to make McCoy trust him - the kid still figured he was playing some sort of game here. Figuring he could turn the tables. McCoy had made the shitlegged table and he wasn't giving it up any time soon. Of course, Kirk wanted to think so, he was welcome to. As long as he kept taking it when McCoy felt like giving it. Which had been pretty fucking frequently.

"Gym might be good. I missed more than a few days, taking care of your sorry ass."

behnd_blueyes April 16 2010, 19:08:23 UTC

Everyone played games. In a sense, there was only one in town, and you played or you got fucked. Sometimes you got fucked by playing, but it was better than not starting at all. Sure, he was being used. He knew that. But he also knew that being used wasn't the same as being owned, and that there were plenty of ways to use yourself so that it evened out in the end. Kirk didn't trust anyone. But he could sleep next to McCoy, could take what was dished out and even like it, and not feel totally bought ( ... )

sharpestscalpel April 16 2010, 19:27:54 UTC

McCoy could figure it out, parse it together from the few things Kirk had said - boy didn't like belonging to anyone but he needed it just as much. Hell, needed it more than anything else, to be part of something, to belong to someone even as he owned them in return ( ... )

behnd_blueyes April 16 2010, 19:40:08 UTC

Kirk was fucked up, but it wasn't exactly that that kept him from accepting being owned, or the fact he needed it. The fact was, he had no models for that type of reciprocity. You owned or you were owned. You paid, or you were paid. Which wasn't to say it colored everything--people bought in different currency, and he and Uhura had had a sort of partnership that had existed on a sexual-professional level Kirk got ( ... )

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