(no subject)
GRAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I hate myself!!! Nick's going out with Kayla! Since Spring Break! And he didnt even have the balls to tell me himself! Marissa told me and he hasnt even mentioned it at all! And i had sent him a couple emails about shit that i never woulda said if i didnt think tht he liked me! I mean, i know that he liked me, or whatever but it was really not nice to lead me on like he did. He's still doing it too, i dun think he knows that i know about him and Kayla! I feel so stupid! The ONE TIME i let anyone know how i feel, i'm shot down and not only that, but led on. I hate humanity! I thought i was over the whole "i hate people i hope they all burn in hell for eternity" thing, but i'm not. I really do hate people. I dunno what the hell i was thinking! Why would Nick ever want to go out with ME! I mean, it's ME! Gina! I'm a loser. He could have anyone he wants, so why me?!?! I guess i was just on cloud nine and not willing to see the thunderhead forming above me. Well, the shit has hit the fan, so to say. I dunno what to even do. I could never hate Nick, he's too much of a sweetheart, and we'll still be friends. I'll have to shove me feeling up my ass and grin and bear it. I hate myself. I cant believe i let fall again. The higher you fly the further you fall. And damn! Did i ever fall!
On another note: I found out that i don't need any Math or Science or English or Social Studies. I still need to take an English and Soc class next year, it required even if i dun need the credits. So my schedual for next year is: English 12, Gov't/Econ., Graphic Arts (3 periods a day), Drama/mythology, and "On Your Own" (a Lifeskills class, it's required). Then i'll have two study halls. There's not gonna be an Art class next year, Mrs. Erickson's retiring, and they're just dropping the whole Art Program. Which sucks. It reallllllly sucks! I wont have anywhere to go during to stupid school assemblies or during study hall or during lunch. I dunno tho. I think that me and Shigomi'll have a lot of classes together. Maybe i'll have something with Gene next year, that'd be cool! He's been being such a sweetheart, helping me carry my ladder (to paint) and complimenting my mural all the time and just generally being adorable. And when i fall, there he is, still the same, never changing, giving me something to fall back on. He doesnt even know he does it, but he does. I get shot down and there he is. I dun think he'll ever ask me out and he WON'T lead me on or tease me. It nice to know that at least i dun have to worry about ONE guy! I'm glad.
I think that i'm going to go write some of my draft for that Enlgish paper now. My dad's coming home tomorrow night for the weekend. Then he's going back to Mnpls. I guess i'll catch ya lata. Sayonara!
I'm wearing: plaid pants, black hoodie, wrist cuffs, no sock. (i seem to where this alot, but its cuz i dun have any other clothes, i neeeeeeed pants!)
On another note: I found out that i don't need any Math or Science or English or Social Studies. I still need to take an English and Soc class next year, it required even if i dun need the credits. So my schedual for next year is: English 12, Gov't/Econ., Graphic Arts (3 periods a day), Drama/mythology, and "On Your Own" (a Lifeskills class, it's required). Then i'll have two study halls. There's not gonna be an Art class next year, Mrs. Erickson's retiring, and they're just dropping the whole Art Program. Which sucks. It reallllllly sucks! I wont have anywhere to go during to stupid school assemblies or during study hall or during lunch. I dunno tho. I think that me and Shigomi'll have a lot of classes together. Maybe i'll have something with Gene next year, that'd be cool! He's been being such a sweetheart, helping me carry my ladder (to paint) and complimenting my mural all the time and just generally being adorable. And when i fall, there he is, still the same, never changing, giving me something to fall back on. He doesnt even know he does it, but he does. I get shot down and there he is. I dun think he'll ever ask me out and he WON'T lead me on or tease me. It nice to know that at least i dun have to worry about ONE guy! I'm glad.
I think that i'm going to go write some of my draft for that Enlgish paper now. My dad's coming home tomorrow night for the weekend. Then he's going back to Mnpls. I guess i'll catch ya lata. Sayonara!
I'm wearing: plaid pants, black hoodie, wrist cuffs, no sock. (i seem to where this alot, but its cuz i dun have any other clothes, i neeeeeeed pants!)