(no subject)
an interesting start to what promises to be an interesting summer.
the daunting question of "what the hell should we do tonight?" is already redundant and pre-meditated.
as if each night will yield the same answer, "there is never anything to fucking do here."
im restless and that scares me.
"single-minded to the point of recklessness."
its coming.
im scared for erinn. and i may not be best friends with her, but i love her and she means a lot to me.
i wish there was something i could have done.
or something i can do now.
she is an amazing friend and person. that is all that needs to be said.
its when i get home from my evening forays that i really think.
i lie in my bed, lights off, eyes wide open, thinking. the thoughts that pop into my head unnerve me.
i fight them off and then fall into a fitful sleep. and when i wake, i cant remember them, but i remember their presence.
i have a constant unsatiable desire... for what, i dont know. or maybe there are just so many things that i can really pinpoint it. but its always there. just an emptiness.
and the Under-Toad (read John Irving), well it lurks everywhere.
the daunting question of "what the hell should we do tonight?" is already redundant and pre-meditated.
as if each night will yield the same answer, "there is never anything to fucking do here."
im restless and that scares me.
"single-minded to the point of recklessness."
its coming.
im scared for erinn. and i may not be best friends with her, but i love her and she means a lot to me.
i wish there was something i could have done.
or something i can do now.
she is an amazing friend and person. that is all that needs to be said.
its when i get home from my evening forays that i really think.
i lie in my bed, lights off, eyes wide open, thinking. the thoughts that pop into my head unnerve me.
i fight them off and then fall into a fitful sleep. and when i wake, i cant remember them, but i remember their presence.
i have a constant unsatiable desire... for what, i dont know. or maybe there are just so many things that i can really pinpoint it. but its always there. just an emptiness.
and the Under-Toad (read John Irving), well it lurks everywhere.