[locked to Elizabeth]

[beginstofly]

You -

There are those missing persons signs and I KNOW you're not missing and can take care of yourself and all (duh, Zombie-Ass-Kicker-of-Doom!) but I - you haven't written in your journal and I haven't seen you and I'm worried and ... yeah, I just want to see how you're doing.

You're ok, right?

Comments

[pplrunincircles]

It's kind of a long story. I fought with Josef. He didn't want me talking to my dad, again. I mean he would have let me make my own decisions. He's never you know like controlling or anything, but he didn't think it was a good idea considering what happened last time. And I got angry and frustrated, because I still wanted to hope that maybe somehow I could get through to him.

Anyway, so I hadn't seen Josef in two weeks, because yeah I get stubborn, and it took that long for me to be able to meet with my dad. My dad told me that if I stayed with him Friday night that he'd go and take the missing person report down.

But we-- Have you ever seen those talk shows where troubled kids get brought to like juvie or jail to show them what's waiting for them? That's kind of what happened with me.

:D I am the zombie-killer. As you can see, I got out of the situation. Escaped through a window in the bathroom lobby. I'm definitely ok. Josef met me at the Conrad later and brought me home so I'm home again. I think I may stay here all day long.

I'm glad you do. Not a lot of people have that part, but it's very important, even if it'll keep hurting us. I believe it's very important to always have hope. There's so much in this life to be hopeful about.

[beginstofly]

... Relationship are hard. It sounds like this Josef guy really watches out for you, though, which is good. Even if you don't need that, everybody kind of needs that, you know?

He - wait - he - HE TOOK YOU TO JUVIE??? I -

You - you won't tell me where he lives, will you? Would Josef?

I am VERY glad you're okay and home (home is good!) and tell Josef to give you a hug for me!

I'm not always glad. But, yeah, it's important to be hopeful! It's the only way to get through everything, I guess.

[pplrunincircles]

Yeah, they are hard but worth it. I know what you mean. It's nice in the end. It really is.

He did. He has contacts there. It was only for the day, and it wasn't that bad. I met some really awesome people. I'm just angry that he lied to me.

Why would you want to know where he lives?

Home is the best! You don't realize how much something means to you until it's not there, even for a silly two week absence of that thing. Uh. I don't know if Josef would know what to do if I told him to give me a hug for you. He's... Uhm. I will get a hug out of him though and pretend it's from you. Assuming it's not a sexy hug. But like you know a comforting hug.

I know it's hard to be glad when hoping gets you hurt so deep. I promise that it's good to hope. I've seen people without hope. I've seen people who have so much more darkness than light in them. It's not a life anyone should want. It's sad and lonely and exhausting. And they usually end up ending it all.

[beginstofly]

I'm ... glad you met awesome people. But sad your dad lied to you, that really sucks.

...Well I think that if he ever takes you hostage again or something or if you go missing a friend should know where to find him, 'cause he seems responsible for a lot of ... your missingness. You know? Yeah! That sounded good!

Two weeks can be a long time. And yeah. ... Home is good.

He's how? Why ... wouldn't he like to hug you for me? I mean ... people hug each other all the time! I - I'm not trying to make a move or something!!

Which is no offense to you!!! I just - I like boys and stuff ...

Nevermind

It is NOT a sexy hug, don't worry. It was meant to be! Comforting. Comforting, I mean!

...Wow, that last part was heavy. I - I know. I mean, that it would be sad and -

I don't -

I just know what you mean. Anyway.

Make your boyfriend give you hug.

Yes.

[pplrunincircles]

Yeah, especially since we spent like the evening together. I thought we were really bonding, you know?

I understand that. Josef knows where he lives actually. I used to live there, and he walked me home one time. He has amazing self control now that I think about it

No, no, Johnny, you've got it all wrong! I know you're not trying to make a move. I mean I think of you as a brother. It's just that

Josef doesn't really understand stuff like that. He'd probably be silent like ..............................ing at me until the end of time. I just don't think he likes to do things for other people except for me. I know it's not really a big deal, but. I mean he doesn't get why people celebrate Christmas or just things like that. It's not you. It's him. And I say that with all of the love in the world.

I'm sorry! I didn't mean to get so heavy at the end with everything. There is light and good, okay? I see so much of it in you. :) If you're ever feeling that darkness, you know you can talk to me about it, right? There's no reason to hide it or avoid it. It certainly has never made me love anyone less.

[beginstofly]

That was so very mean of him. He does not deserve a daughter like you. What a CHUMP.

Okay, good, 'cause I think of you as a sister, too, and ...yeah.

...He sounds really WEIRD, Elizabeth. But I trust your liking of him, so he must be a good guy.

Even if he doesn't get Christmas. (wow.)

No, you don't have to be sorry! It's just -

Anyway, yeah. And I know. Sometimes darkness makes you love a person even more, even if you shouldn't.

... I don't know why that is.