[ 1000 Provisions ]

[beganinthe12th]

Excalibur's 1000 provisions. The ones in bold are canon; everything else is suggested and made up.

1: My mornings start off with a cup of coffee with cream
22: A refreshing morning begins with a refreshing greeting
56: You must submit yourself daily to the rigors of polishing my cane
57: Always place a dehumidifier in your room.
58: When I'm humming a tune to myself, you must not speak!
75: Excalibur's birthday must be celebrated in a grand manner
111: You must turn 1000 somersaults while singing God Save the Queen and making my afternoon tea. Earl Grey only, please.
172: Seek harmony seek it thus
202: The highest class toilet must be prepared
278: You must never permit carrots in my meals
349: You must never violate my food preferences
452: You must attend my daily 5 hour story telling party
473: You're to always stay 3 steps behind me while walking
578: A hero shall always convey the truth
602: Food must be freshly prepared
667: Always praise Excalibur
679: I must always have a dehumidifier in my room
778: Never mail out packages cash-on-delivery
998: When you order a package for home delivery, you must always use cash on delivery