Heads or Tails
Title: Heads or Tails
Pairing: Damon/Elena & Stefan/Elena
Rating: PG
Word count: 984
Notes: Set sometime in the future when Damon and Elena have Stefan back and all the Rippah/Klaus drama is done. Written for my Holiday Fic Request Craziness. December 1st. midnightblack07 asked for Damon/Elena & Stefan/Elena, with the prompt 'two sides of the same coin...'
Caroline is the first person Elena admits it to: she doesn't know what to do.
Sure, she told Alaric she didn't know what she was doing, but it's not quite the same thing. And as scary as it is to be out of control, Elena has decided it's scarier that it all comes down to her - again, always, she thinks miserably.
Her parents were her. If she hadn't gone out, if she hadn't stayed so late, if she hadn't been drinking, if she hadn't bullied Matt into drinking with her, if she hadn't called them to come pick her up, if she hadn't been threatening to puke on the leather in the back, if she hadn't.
The sacrifice. All her. Because of her. Because of who she is. And she cringes when she remembers how she insisted on calling all of the shots.
Elena buries her face in her hands, digs it out again, looks up.
"Now this. And this is worse, Caroline."
Caroline rolls her eyes in that affectionate way she has of rolling her eyes. "A little perspective, please. Picking a Salvatore is not worse than getting sacrificed on an altar of blood to unleash a pack of wolfpires on an unsuspecting population of snacks and/or chew toys."
Elena rolls her eyes in that sulky way she has of rolling her eyes.
Caroline shrugs. "Just pick one, Elena!" she goads. "Just do it! I don't know! Consult your horoscope! Write to Cosmo! Flip a coin! You'll see, it'll be easy when it's over."
Elena frowns. "You want me to flip a coin to decide the course of my life?"
Affectionate eyeroll. "Your boyfriend is not the course of your life. And you keep saying you can't choose. So why not let fate choose for you?"
Elena grabs her sleeves in her hands, sniffles. "I'm not going to flip a coin, Caroline," she says.
Caroline groans, spins around in an agitated little circle, kneels in front of her friend, grabs her hands out of her sleeves. "So let's rock, paper, scissors it, alright? You and me." She smiles brightly, makes Elena's hand a fist and does the same with hers, says hastily "I'll be Stefan," frowns. "No wait! I don't want that kind of responsibility." She bites her lip, snorts derisively. "I'll be Damon."
Elena stares at her, dumbfounded, whilst she counts down from three.
"Three, two, one!"
Caroline's fingers are scissors. Elena's hand is still curled tightly in on itself.
"Oops," Caroline says. "You blunted Damon."
Elena stares at her for a moment, her brow furrowing distractedly. "What?" she says. "What? No. I wasn't playing. Wait, what? That's not fair."
Caroline sighs, stands up, dusts her hands off.
"It's not about what's fair, Elena," she says.
***
When Elena asks Damon to flip a coin he makes a fuss. Of course.
"You flip it," he says, flippantly, he says. (Yes, he says the word "flippantly," with one of those stupid, lazy, to-himself smiles.)
"Fine," Elena huffs. "I'll flip it, just pick a side."
"You pick a side," Damon says, self-smiling again.
"Kind of the point," Elena mutters, and he pretends he doesn't hear her, even though of course he does.
There is a long pause after that, which Elena ends with "Just pick one, Damon! Heads or tails, okay?"
Damon purses his lips, considers, or pretends to consider. And then he says "Hmm, nope. I happen to be fond of both heads and tails. Can't choose. Sorry."
Elena shuffles her feet angrily. She wants to blurt out "You're ridiculous," catches herself, shakes her head.
He's not ridiculous.
Well, no, he is.
But he's not as ridiculous as this.
"Fine, whatever, doesn't matter," she mutters.
And he hears.
"What are we playing for?" he asks, with the tiniest hint of taking her seriously. "I'm not going to choose anything unless I know what we're playing for."
He cocks his head to one side.
Elena shakes hers. "We're not playing," she says, with the tiniest hint of snotty.
"Okay, what were we playing for?"
Elena looks him in the eye while she tries to think of a plausible lie.
Whatever it is it'll be more plausible than this, she thinks, equal parts comforted and self-loathing.
"I was…" she hesitates, finishes lamely, "… gonna buy some shoes."
Damon purses his lips again. This time he's definitely thinking about it.
"Get the red," he says finally.
Elena frowns, thrown off guard. "They didn't have red," she replies quickly, before she can check herself and this whole runaway farce of a conversation.
"Hm…" Damon crosses his arms. "Did they have green? I like green. They'll go with your…" he hesitates, gestures uselessly. "You know what, get a green dress while you're at it."
Elena sighs and shoves him in a way that is more like nudging him in a way that is more like the only way she knows how to hug Damon when the world isn't ending.
"I have a green dress already," she says. "And shut up."
***
When Elena asks Stefan to flip a coin, he digs a dime out of his pocket and gives it to her.
"Heads," he says, with a smile and a shrug.
Elena smiles back at him for what feels like the longest time.
She flips the coin, blinks lengthily before taking her hand away.
"Tails," she murmurs.
She looks up, says softly. "You lose."
Stefan smiles. "What do I lose?" he asks, just as softly, like it's that simple.
Elena smiles back at him again, for the longest time, again.
Her throat pounds, the metal sweats angrily in her palm.
She swallows suddenly, like the ordinary bodily function surprises her. She holds the coin up under his nose.
"This," she says, "You lose this."
She tells him a lie that's true - something nonchalant about him buying her a soda.
Stefan follows her to the cafeteria.
Pairing: Damon/Elena & Stefan/Elena
Rating: PG
Word count: 984
Notes: Set sometime in the future when Damon and Elena have Stefan back and all the Rippah/Klaus drama is done. Written for my Holiday Fic Request Craziness. December 1st. midnightblack07 asked for Damon/Elena & Stefan/Elena, with the prompt 'two sides of the same coin...'
Caroline is the first person Elena admits it to: she doesn't know what to do.
Sure, she told Alaric she didn't know what she was doing, but it's not quite the same thing. And as scary as it is to be out of control, Elena has decided it's scarier that it all comes down to her - again, always, she thinks miserably.
Her parents were her. If she hadn't gone out, if she hadn't stayed so late, if she hadn't been drinking, if she hadn't bullied Matt into drinking with her, if she hadn't called them to come pick her up, if she hadn't been threatening to puke on the leather in the back, if she hadn't.
The sacrifice. All her. Because of her. Because of who she is. And she cringes when she remembers how she insisted on calling all of the shots.
Elena buries her face in her hands, digs it out again, looks up.
"Now this. And this is worse, Caroline."
Caroline rolls her eyes in that affectionate way she has of rolling her eyes. "A little perspective, please. Picking a Salvatore is not worse than getting sacrificed on an altar of blood to unleash a pack of wolfpires on an unsuspecting population of snacks and/or chew toys."
Elena rolls her eyes in that sulky way she has of rolling her eyes.
Caroline shrugs. "Just pick one, Elena!" she goads. "Just do it! I don't know! Consult your horoscope! Write to Cosmo! Flip a coin! You'll see, it'll be easy when it's over."
Elena frowns. "You want me to flip a coin to decide the course of my life?"
Affectionate eyeroll. "Your boyfriend is not the course of your life. And you keep saying you can't choose. So why not let fate choose for you?"
Elena grabs her sleeves in her hands, sniffles. "I'm not going to flip a coin, Caroline," she says.
Caroline groans, spins around in an agitated little circle, kneels in front of her friend, grabs her hands out of her sleeves. "So let's rock, paper, scissors it, alright? You and me." She smiles brightly, makes Elena's hand a fist and does the same with hers, says hastily "I'll be Stefan," frowns. "No wait! I don't want that kind of responsibility." She bites her lip, snorts derisively. "I'll be Damon."
Elena stares at her, dumbfounded, whilst she counts down from three.
"Three, two, one!"
Caroline's fingers are scissors. Elena's hand is still curled tightly in on itself.
"Oops," Caroline says. "You blunted Damon."
Elena stares at her for a moment, her brow furrowing distractedly. "What?" she says. "What? No. I wasn't playing. Wait, what? That's not fair."
Caroline sighs, stands up, dusts her hands off.
"It's not about what's fair, Elena," she says.
***
When Elena asks Damon to flip a coin he makes a fuss. Of course.
"You flip it," he says, flippantly, he says. (Yes, he says the word "flippantly," with one of those stupid, lazy, to-himself smiles.)
"Fine," Elena huffs. "I'll flip it, just pick a side."
"You pick a side," Damon says, self-smiling again.
"Kind of the point," Elena mutters, and he pretends he doesn't hear her, even though of course he does.
There is a long pause after that, which Elena ends with "Just pick one, Damon! Heads or tails, okay?"
Damon purses his lips, considers, or pretends to consider. And then he says "Hmm, nope. I happen to be fond of both heads and tails. Can't choose. Sorry."
Elena shuffles her feet angrily. She wants to blurt out "You're ridiculous," catches herself, shakes her head.
He's not ridiculous.
Well, no, he is.
But he's not as ridiculous as this.
"Fine, whatever, doesn't matter," she mutters.
And he hears.
"What are we playing for?" he asks, with the tiniest hint of taking her seriously. "I'm not going to choose anything unless I know what we're playing for."
He cocks his head to one side.
Elena shakes hers. "We're not playing," she says, with the tiniest hint of snotty.
"Okay, what were we playing for?"
Elena looks him in the eye while she tries to think of a plausible lie.
Whatever it is it'll be more plausible than this, she thinks, equal parts comforted and self-loathing.
"I was…" she hesitates, finishes lamely, "… gonna buy some shoes."
Damon purses his lips again. This time he's definitely thinking about it.
"Get the red," he says finally.
Elena frowns, thrown off guard. "They didn't have red," she replies quickly, before she can check herself and this whole runaway farce of a conversation.
"Hm…" Damon crosses his arms. "Did they have green? I like green. They'll go with your…" he hesitates, gestures uselessly. "You know what, get a green dress while you're at it."
Elena sighs and shoves him in a way that is more like nudging him in a way that is more like the only way she knows how to hug Damon when the world isn't ending.
"I have a green dress already," she says. "And shut up."
***
When Elena asks Stefan to flip a coin, he digs a dime out of his pocket and gives it to her.
"Heads," he says, with a smile and a shrug.
Elena smiles back at him for what feels like the longest time.
She flips the coin, blinks lengthily before taking her hand away.
"Tails," she murmurs.
She looks up, says softly. "You lose."
Stefan smiles. "What do I lose?" he asks, just as softly, like it's that simple.
Elena smiles back at him again, for the longest time, again.
Her throat pounds, the metal sweats angrily in her palm.
She swallows suddenly, like the ordinary bodily function surprises her. She holds the coin up under his nose.
"This," she says, "You lose this."
She tells him a lie that's true - something nonchalant about him buying her a soda.
Stefan follows her to the cafeteria.