Working Day
Last night I realised that, since I'm going to be busy tomorrow, all the work I've been slacking off on needed to get done today. So, today I've literally done nothing but work, work, work, clean my room, work. BUT! I only have a movie left to watch and I am DONE for the next two days! (Japanese and Astronomy tomorrow besides, obviously).
I'm soooooo excited. GLAMBERT TOMORROW~
For some reason, despite one of my college resolutions is "not be such a closeted bitch" (they're all kind of worded like that) I still am having a lot of trouble being open so far in college. Even with people who I shouldn't be afraid to let know, I tend to clam up or change my wordings about simple things. I caught myself doing that at an ALLIANCE meeting last night. I mean, wtf? And there's this one website I read that's really gay (gay, but tame. It's about entertainment) and I never read it in public. Even when I want to. I mean, what am I even afraid of? I'll walk in front of a car but I won't casually mention that I'm not into dudes/attracted to women? What do I even think'll happen, that a thousand Baptists will descend from the heavens and pelt me with bibles until I bleed? I suppose I'm just afraid of being judged and categorized. I'd much rather someone think of me as me then as "that lesbian chick", but by the time someone knows me it's even MORE awkward to mention it. Ahh what is my life. I'm sure that this just all comes from living happily in Narnia all through high school, but I have a hell of a lot of respect for anyone who's out.
BRB, listening to Aftermath and sobbing. XDDDD
I'm soooooo excited. GLAMBERT TOMORROW~
For some reason, despite one of my college resolutions is "not be such a closeted bitch" (they're all kind of worded like that) I still am having a lot of trouble being open so far in college. Even with people who I shouldn't be afraid to let know, I tend to clam up or change my wordings about simple things. I caught myself doing that at an ALLIANCE meeting last night. I mean, wtf? And there's this one website I read that's really gay (gay, but tame. It's about entertainment) and I never read it in public. Even when I want to. I mean, what am I even afraid of? I'll walk in front of a car but I won't casually mention that I'm not into dudes/attracted to women? What do I even think'll happen, that a thousand Baptists will descend from the heavens and pelt me with bibles until I bleed? I suppose I'm just afraid of being judged and categorized. I'd much rather someone think of me as me then as "that lesbian chick", but by the time someone knows me it's even MORE awkward to mention it. Ahh what is my life. I'm sure that this just all comes from living happily in Narnia all through high school, but I have a hell of a lot of respect for anyone who's out.
BRB, listening to Aftermath and sobbing. XDDDD