what a waste
Last night i stayed up till 1:00AM (which if you know me u know that that's REALLY late for me haha). I couldn't fall asleep cuz i was crying and thinking about how my academic career was basically a waste of my hard work and my time in general. Good thing i realized this senior year when i'm basically done lol.
I went to a REALLY small grammar school called Our Lady Help of Christians or "Chapel". I had the biggest class out of the whole school, which was only 22 (16 girls and 6 boys). Just from this there was sort of pressure to be smart. At the end of each quarter, we had award ceremonies for all the people on the honor roll (1st honors and 2nd honors) and perfect attendance and other gay awards they came up with. When they called people up, almost every person from my class was called up for something. I always got first honors cuz i had like a 97 average. I wasn't the most athletic (even though i played basketball, softball, and volleyball). I CERTAINLY wasn't the most popular aka prettiest (even though all the boys except for 2 were ugly neways lol). What i was was the most talented (even though i only got to show this once a year by playing the piano in the talent show and writing some poems for special occasions). However, i tried to be as smart as possible because i knew i couldn't succeed in life just because i could write some poems. Fortunately, getting good grades always came easy for me ever since i was a little girl. I was in advanced english since kindergarten whenever it was available. I even skipped 3rd grade reading. But at my school, i wasn't special.
Graduation came, and i finally got to part with Chapel (i never really liked it there). I was destined to come to Sacred Heart. I didn't even LOOK at any other high schools--and i didn't really care one way or the other. Why did i go to sacred heart? two words: Jennifer Mis. My mom is best friends with jen's aunt and good friends with jen's mom too. So i heard about SHA and how she loved it. That was good enough for me. SHA was a good school, and anything would be better than Chapel.
I did pretty good at SHA, even though it wasn't as nice as i expected it to be. I made the honor roll (most of the time with distinction) each quarter. Besides just the academic part, i finally met people i could grow close with. Don't get me wrong, i had friends at Chapel and still are friends with most of them, it's just that i never really had a best friend and Chapel and now i have a close group of best friends and i love it. Plus at SHA i can talk to almost anyone and most people aren't complete bitches like at Chapel. I also haven't missed a single day of school at SHA haha.
Dun, Dun, Dun. Senior Year. "Pick a career Beth". "Find a college Beth". "Decide upon your whole future in just a few months Beth--but senior year is the 'time of ur life' so have fun"...no pressure at ALL lol. Well the career part i kind of had an idea. I love kids so much that i knew i had to do something with children. Since day care workers make 2.23894 cents i had to find an alternate career. So ba-BAM! A speech therapist is what i'll be.
The college part is what is killing me slowly. I want to stay local cuz i don't think i could handle going to a whole new town all by myself. Having ur parents help pack up ur room, drive you to ur dorm, give u a big hug goodbye and then leave u there for like 3 months when u come back for a few weeks then go back?! plus u havta deal with classes, laundry, food, and EVERYTHING else by urself?! No seeing ur friends from ur past like at all unless they go to the same college?! NOT FOR ME--I'D PROLLY DIE. So the only local colleges that have my major are UB and Buff State. So i guess i'll settle with UB.
Which brings me to my main reason of sadness slash aggravation. It doesn't take a genius to get into UB, so basically i wasted all that hard work on nothing. I could have slacked sooooo much and still have ended up right where i'll be in a few months. So now i've set these high standards for myself and now that i realize that it's really a joke i'm not gonna wanna care about school anymore. But my parents will flip a shit if i stop now. So i'm gonna have to keep on working hard for nothing. And even at UB as long as i get the stupid degree it won't matter how good i do.
Main message: school is pointless as long as u pass. I mean most of the stuff u need in life u learn by like 5th grade. The rest is just to occupy ur time so u don't take the jobs away from the old people. I mean i'm gonna be a speech therapist. No child i teach is gonna ask me to find the fourth root of 394x + ur mom. Nobody is gonna ask me what happened in 12000 BC in Rome--and if they do they're prolly juss a rapist so i'd run away.
SCHOOL IS POINTLESS. WE SHOULD ALL JUSS QUIT.
I went to a REALLY small grammar school called Our Lady Help of Christians or "Chapel". I had the biggest class out of the whole school, which was only 22 (16 girls and 6 boys). Just from this there was sort of pressure to be smart. At the end of each quarter, we had award ceremonies for all the people on the honor roll (1st honors and 2nd honors) and perfect attendance and other gay awards they came up with. When they called people up, almost every person from my class was called up for something. I always got first honors cuz i had like a 97 average. I wasn't the most athletic (even though i played basketball, softball, and volleyball). I CERTAINLY wasn't the most popular aka prettiest (even though all the boys except for 2 were ugly neways lol). What i was was the most talented (even though i only got to show this once a year by playing the piano in the talent show and writing some poems for special occasions). However, i tried to be as smart as possible because i knew i couldn't succeed in life just because i could write some poems. Fortunately, getting good grades always came easy for me ever since i was a little girl. I was in advanced english since kindergarten whenever it was available. I even skipped 3rd grade reading. But at my school, i wasn't special.
Graduation came, and i finally got to part with Chapel (i never really liked it there). I was destined to come to Sacred Heart. I didn't even LOOK at any other high schools--and i didn't really care one way or the other. Why did i go to sacred heart? two words: Jennifer Mis. My mom is best friends with jen's aunt and good friends with jen's mom too. So i heard about SHA and how she loved it. That was good enough for me. SHA was a good school, and anything would be better than Chapel.
I did pretty good at SHA, even though it wasn't as nice as i expected it to be. I made the honor roll (most of the time with distinction) each quarter. Besides just the academic part, i finally met people i could grow close with. Don't get me wrong, i had friends at Chapel and still are friends with most of them, it's just that i never really had a best friend and Chapel and now i have a close group of best friends and i love it. Plus at SHA i can talk to almost anyone and most people aren't complete bitches like at Chapel. I also haven't missed a single day of school at SHA haha.
Dun, Dun, Dun. Senior Year. "Pick a career Beth". "Find a college Beth". "Decide upon your whole future in just a few months Beth--but senior year is the 'time of ur life' so have fun"...no pressure at ALL lol. Well the career part i kind of had an idea. I love kids so much that i knew i had to do something with children. Since day care workers make 2.23894 cents i had to find an alternate career. So ba-BAM! A speech therapist is what i'll be.
The college part is what is killing me slowly. I want to stay local cuz i don't think i could handle going to a whole new town all by myself. Having ur parents help pack up ur room, drive you to ur dorm, give u a big hug goodbye and then leave u there for like 3 months when u come back for a few weeks then go back?! plus u havta deal with classes, laundry, food, and EVERYTHING else by urself?! No seeing ur friends from ur past like at all unless they go to the same college?! NOT FOR ME--I'D PROLLY DIE. So the only local colleges that have my major are UB and Buff State. So i guess i'll settle with UB.
Which brings me to my main reason of sadness slash aggravation. It doesn't take a genius to get into UB, so basically i wasted all that hard work on nothing. I could have slacked sooooo much and still have ended up right where i'll be in a few months. So now i've set these high standards for myself and now that i realize that it's really a joke i'm not gonna wanna care about school anymore. But my parents will flip a shit if i stop now. So i'm gonna have to keep on working hard for nothing. And even at UB as long as i get the stupid degree it won't matter how good i do.
Main message: school is pointless as long as u pass. I mean most of the stuff u need in life u learn by like 5th grade. The rest is just to occupy ur time so u don't take the jobs away from the old people. I mean i'm gonna be a speech therapist. No child i teach is gonna ask me to find the fourth root of 394x + ur mom. Nobody is gonna ask me what happened in 12000 BC in Rome--and if they do they're prolly juss a rapist so i'd run away.
SCHOOL IS POINTLESS. WE SHOULD ALL JUSS QUIT.