6th course: cooking's not just a hobby, kids

[beejinthewalkin]

That was shitty marinara. I say that not just as a pretentious little bitch. I also say that as a trained chef. Heavy on the garlic, low on any real flavor. A good marinara is blood simple, children. You'd think that all powerful gods could figure it out but no, of course not. What the fuck with they come up with next

Comments

[archivy]

I believe to most untrained gustative nerves, the marinara sauce tasted well enough.

[beejinthewalkin]

... Either I'm as dumb as I look or you are way too smart for a tiny blond body such as you have.

But, yes, to the average, unrefined palate I'm sure it tasted a'right.

[archivy]

Your observation is quite accurate. I am the Archive. But I really am eleven years old.

[beejinthewalkin]

I'm going to go right ahead and assume that being the Archive means you're some more-than-human powerhouse of brains and ancient knowledge. Nice of you not to make a crack on my intelligence though, what with walking right into it like I did.

Should I call you the Archive or do you have something more 11-year-old-girl I can call you?

[archivy]

Again, your assumption is correct. I am the sum of human knowledge. And you are welcome.

Some people have taken to calling me Ivy because they think the Archive isn't an appropriate name for a child.

[beejinthewalkin]

Well they'd be right. Far as I can tell, pronoun or not, s'more of a title isn't it.

A fucking rather uninspired one at that. Ivy'll do. But what brings you 'round my corner, droplet?

[archivy]

It is who and what I am, and it is the name that has been used for the last five thousand years.

I am trying to distract myself.

[beejinthewalkin]

Just about time for a change then. Same thing over and over an' it gets tired, no matter how much you liked it at first.

Distract yourself from what? Or never mind. Talking about it probably isn't very distracting.

[archivy]

I do not mind it when people call me Ivy, but the Archive is my name.

My bodyguard has left the City and I am trying to figure out what to do now. And I miss Kincaid.

[beejinthewalkin]

Never easy to lose someone, dewdrop and if you were but a few years old I'd suggest a pint of bitter but you're a bit young for that. In a physical sense, anyway.

I hear that they come back sometimes

[archivy]

I strongly believe that alcohol is not a solution to problems. And I am not supposed to get attached, anyway. But I still liked Auron. And I miss Kincaid. I wonder how he's doing.

I'm eleven in mentally, too, I just remember everything.

[beejinthewalkin]

Awful lot going 'round in a little brain. Not supposed tos only work when you care enough to listen to them. Anyway, what's the point of living in a world you're not connected to because you care about the people in it. I have it on good authority that I am a no good thug, lech, drunkard and all around knave but even I know that if you don't have the people you care about you don't have anything.

You don't talk like any 11 year old I've ever met.

[archivy]

The emotions of becoming attached and allowing myself to care - and then possibly lose - people in additon to the knowledge I carry has been known to drive hosts insane and I rather like my sanity.

And I have to remain neutral.

That is because I am not like any eleven year old you have ever met.

[beejinthewalkin]

...

That's a lot to carry on one small set of shoulders, dewdrop. I don't envy you.

I once met eleven year old twins that liked their bacon. But I was pretty hung over and I'm not actually positive that it wasn't just one annoying little redhead that I was seeing in double.

[archivy]

It is. I do not have a choice in this matter.

I like bacon, too. And cookies and pie, but too much sugar is bad for the teeth.

[beejinthewalkin]

I like bacon, too. And cookies and pie as well. I try not to think about what's bad for me and just enjoy things as I go. Doesn't always work so well for me but it's sure a lot of fun.

[ooc: it's time to get a few hours of sleep in! tags will be returned when i'm no longer having a wicked nap.]