just driving around aimlessly is my favorite.
So, I've been thinking, I need a change in my life. I need something (or someone?) new. Something that I can be passionate about. Everything is the same, it's just blah. Same thing everyday.
Nothing seems to be going right, or what 'right' is to me. I feel like I'm losing touch or 'drifting' away with some people whom I love, and that scares me. It hurts me so much, because I love them with all my heart and I just want to be close with them and have it be like it was. Maybe (hopefully!) it's just a silly phase, and we can all be together again. And maybe I'm just overanalyzing like I do with everything and I'm just freaking out about nothing? Yeah.. I would like to go with that.
I feel like I'm putting so much effort into this, and it's not coming from the opposite end. I try and try, but seem to get no effort in return. You say "when are we going to hang out?" "I miss you" blah blah blah.. but I don't see you making any effort either honey. Sorry, I guess I see how you felt, but if you know how that made you feel, don't you think you wouldn't want me to feel the same way? Hmm.. just a thought. It would just be nice to get a phone call or something of the sort on a friday evening and ask if I would like to hang out. It's just so frustrating. Honestly, it definitly isn't helping the situation. I feel like giving up. Once again, I make myself vulnerable and seem to get hurt.
I mean don't get me wrong, I'm not depressed or anything. I'm just not as happy as I could be, but definitly not sad either. There are just some things that I wish could improve a little. I just need something new in my life to keep my interest and keep me motivated. Something that I can put my heart in and have it be fullfilling and keep me happy. Or maybe something spontaneous and fun? Hmm...
Any suggestions??
But I just got informed I'm going to Knott's on Saturday, which I'm excited about.
:]
Nothing seems to be going right, or what 'right' is to me. I feel like I'm losing touch or 'drifting' away with some people whom I love, and that scares me. It hurts me so much, because I love them with all my heart and I just want to be close with them and have it be like it was. Maybe (hopefully!) it's just a silly phase, and we can all be together again. And maybe I'm just overanalyzing like I do with everything and I'm just freaking out about nothing? Yeah.. I would like to go with that.
I feel like I'm putting so much effort into this, and it's not coming from the opposite end. I try and try, but seem to get no effort in return. You say "when are we going to hang out?" "I miss you" blah blah blah.. but I don't see you making any effort either honey. Sorry, I guess I see how you felt, but if you know how that made you feel, don't you think you wouldn't want me to feel the same way? Hmm.. just a thought. It would just be nice to get a phone call or something of the sort on a friday evening and ask if I would like to hang out. It's just so frustrating. Honestly, it definitly isn't helping the situation. I feel like giving up. Once again, I make myself vulnerable and seem to get hurt.
I mean don't get me wrong, I'm not depressed or anything. I'm just not as happy as I could be, but definitly not sad either. There are just some things that I wish could improve a little. I just need something new in my life to keep my interest and keep me motivated. Something that I can put my heart in and have it be fullfilling and keep me happy. Or maybe something spontaneous and fun? Hmm...
Any suggestions??
But I just got informed I'm going to Knott's on Saturday, which I'm excited about.
:]