WHY I hate myself
I am going to be really free in this journal because obvious that no one reads it any ways so im talk to myself bascially ..getting shit off my chest
Ive been trying to hard with this weight program and everyone who knows me and actaully pays attention has been seeing me eat healthler and im been doing all this shit ... IM SO TIRED OF IT.... i want to lose weight ..that's my problem and i understand im disgusting either way and no one will want me no matter what .. but i dont understand why nothing is working for me...i want shopping today and i cried my eyes out in the dressing room ... i couldnt even fit into my regular FUCKING SIZE that i usally am .. SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH THAT... and i havent gained anything... ive lost ...but i just dont understand .. and now im fucking crying dammit.. i havent cried in a long time and i just cant stand it any more... i dont understand why god put me in this sitiuation ..ive been like this all my life ... im stuck in this fat persons body.. im not ugly ...inside and out, im just stuck being fat and i cant get over this trumpih... you skinny ppl dont know how good you have it... ill never be good enough for anyone to look at ,... i have to leave cuz i cant stop crying and i hate crying and yes tammy this is what was bothering me when i got in the car.. fuck it all ...someone shoot me .. i promise ill be happier that way.