I don't care how ridiculous this series makes me, it makes me HAPPY.

[beckerbell]

► OTHER NEWS:
I HAVE OKAMIDEN YOU GUYS AREN'T GOING TO HEAR FROM ME FOR A WEEK HAHAHAHAHA! (Okay, that's a lie, but I really do have Okamiden. My life is so full of joy right now.)

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I BLAME YOU

[still_ciircee]

So, Akiha is buying food for Umeda's place now? And he didn't throw it out??

Umeda finds the food easily. He's not sure how Akiha is getting it IN there, but it's right in the front of his cupboards when he opens them in the morning. He scowls and drop kicks everything into the trash. It makes him feel marginally better, though he notices he's got a twtich going on under his eye. "Idiot," he mutters as he double checks the lock.

The thing is, no matter how many times he checks the lock and how much he bars the door, he keeps finding food in his cupboards that doesn't belong there. It all goes into the trash. Mostly. Sometimes it goes out the window on to that moron Akiha's head. The canned cake (really, that idiot) was especially satifying as it bounced off the top of his head, hit the ground and tripped him as he stumbled. "Stupid," he mutters as he shuts the window with a sharp bang.

For a little while he thinks Akiha has got the message. And then the cat turns up. He wakes up to it staring at him from the end of his bed. "IDIOT," he bellows. The cat meows. Umeda gets himself out of bed and doesn't bother to put on real clothes or flatten his bed-head. He stalks into his kitchen to find that moron making rolled egg. Sweet rolled egg if the smell is anything to go by. "What. Is. That." He points at the cat, which has followed him.

Akiha beams at him and loops his arms around his neck. "She is Senpai's cat," he says, as though that says everything.

Umeda kicks him in the head, careful so that Akiha doesn't slam into the wall and mess up his personal space. Too much. The cat walks over to Akiha and then over his face before leaping up on to the counter to nose at the coffee pot. "Get down," he snaps at her.

The cat gets down promptly and Umeda makes coffee. When Akiha leaps on him and makes him spill, he lets the cat lick it up while he smashes the empty cup over Akiha's moronic head. Whatever.

It goes on and on and one day Umeda smashes his last coffee cup (great, now he has to buy fucking MORE) and throws another jar of jelly in the trash along with the shards. "Would you just stop, you idiot?" he mutters as his cat drinks coffee off the floor.

Akiha smiles up at him from the floor. "I can't," he says simply.

Umeda scowls at him. Jesus, he's going to hurt something kicking him again, he just knows it. "Try."

Sitting up, Akiha beams up at him, his hair down around his face now that his ponytail has come loose. "I did try. No matter what, it seems like Senpai is the only one who can fill up my void." He laughs. "I'm going to keep up doing this until the day one of us dies. So maybe you could get used to it a little, huh?"

Umeda kicks him in the head.

And pulls a hamstring doing it.

He still limps to the door to toss him out on his ass.

The next morning finds more jelly and some peanut butter in his cupboard, nestled up with all of the things that Umeda has bought and stored away. He takes both jars out and glares at them. There's a cartoon dog on the peanut butter and a fucking sun smiling on the jelly jar. He throws them back into the cupboard and glowers at the trash can on his way out the door.

Miraculously, as though he somehow knows and understands, Akiha does not pounce on him even once during the day. Umeda lets him follow him home, irritatingly bright a half step behind him and almost exactly at his side.

Re: I BLAME YOU

[beckerbell]

EXCUSE ME, I WILL BE OVER HERE IN THE CORNER FLAILING NOW. BECAUSE THIS WAS AMAZING. I AM HAPPY TO TAKE THE BLAME. *______*

I love this because, oh, Umeda is a tough nut to crack given how stuck in a rut he is for so long and Akiha being unable to leave him alone (especially since Umeda will fight him the whole way, he doesn't really want Akiha to leave him alone, even if he is the most obnoxious idiot ever) and I am in UTTER LOVE with his cranky attitude and Akiha's relentless positive attitude and KITTYYYYYYYYY.

ALSO, CANNED CAKE. I LAUGHED SO HARD. ONLY AKIHA WOULD MANAGE TO FIND CANNED CAKE. I like to think that Umeda caved when the cat just walked right over Akiha like he was only there to be a stepping stone in her path to the coffee. That was when Umeda knew they would understand each other.

There's a cartoon dog on the peanut butter and a fucking sun smiling on the jelly jar. He throws them back into the cupboard and glowers at the trash can on his way out the door.

THIS IS MY FAVORITE FOREVER. I like to think of all the smiling sun products that will show up in Umeda's home from then on. You know it won't stop at food. Soon there will be smiling sun toothpaste to beam up at him the VERY FIRST THING IN THE MORNING when he goes to brush his teeth! And smiling sun shampoo, EVEN IN THE SHOWER HE CAN'T ESCAPE IT.