Ficlet: Farewell, Monty (CWRPF, Panda!verse, J2, G)
Tai Shan, the panda born at the National Zoo in Washington, is going to China soon. He, like all pandas in the US, is on loan from the Chinese government, and they have ultimate control over when the pandas return to the motherland. So, since I have a lot of FEELINGS about pandas, and since I have a convenient fictional vehicle to write about them, here's pandakeeper!Jared's reaction (and Jensen's) to Tai Shan's departure.
Title: Farewell, Monty
Fandom: CWRPF AU
Pairing: Jared/Jensen
Rating: G for pandas
Summary: The zoo's littlest panda is going away, and Jared is going to miss him. Jensen listens.
Notes: Follows this and this. Unbetaed. 800 words.
Jensen hasn’t seen Jared cry before. Jared is generally the happiest person Jensen has ever met, which makes it all the more jarring to let himself him into Jared’s apartment and find Jared hunched over on the couch, head in his hands, sniffling. “Hey,” he says, looking up, and his voice is thick and his eyes are red, like he’s been at this awhile.
“Hey,” replies Jensen, frozen on the spot with his heart thundering in his ears because whatever made Jared cry like this has to be something pretty awful. And what does Jensen know about giving comfort in the face of awful things? He starts to ask, “Are you okay?” but he realizes how stupid that is before the words are out of his mouth. Jared is looking at him like Jensen is going to say exactly the right thing at any moment, but Jensen can’t. Instead he sits down, puts his arm around Jared’s shoulders, and waits. Jared rubs a wet cheek against the side of Jensen’s neck and sniffles quietly.
After a while with Jensen stroking the soft hair at the nape of his neck, Jared says, “Monty’s going away.”
Jensen feels almost sick with relief, but at the same time he knows how much Jared cares about the pandas, how closely he watches over them. “I’m so sorry,” he whispers, mouth against the tip of Jared’s ear.
“It’s not like we didn’t know… I mean, it was always a loan, and there was always going to be an end, but…” Jared draws in a shaky breath. “I’ve been taking care of him since he was little. I watched him grow up. He helped me ask you out.”
“You didn’t need any help with that.”
“I’m gonna miss him.”
Jensen leans back against the arm of the couch, tugs Jared in to lie against him, a heavy weight against his chest, Jared’s hair getting into his mouth like it always does. “I know you will. I bet he’ll miss you, too.”
Jared hitches out a new sob. “He’ll be happy, you know. The research station has way more pandas than we do. He’ll have friends. He’ll get to have babies. I bet he’ll like that. But it’s still… China’s so far away. And he’s an American citizen. That’s how it works. He was born here, so that makes him an American.”
“I think that only works for people.”
“He’s not ours,” says Jared, and he sounds heartbroken. “We have to have a press conference tomorrow, and I have to not, you know.” He gestures at himself. “Diplomacy, whatever.”
“You can do it,” Jensen says. “You know this’ll be good for Monty. You just have to remember that.”
Jared takes a shaky breath. “Yeah. Yeah, it’ll be good for him.” He fits himself more closely into Jensen’s arms, spinning out stories about Monty’s life at the zoo until he’s laughing instead of crying.
***
Jensen watched the panda cam before he ever met Jared, and he - like the rest of the city - took proprietary joy in watching Monty grow up. But he doesn’t quite understand how huge a deal it is until he goes to the zoo’s farewell celebration and sees the crowd in front of the panda habitat, hears two women comparing their collections of panda pictures. It’s nine on a Saturday morning, cold enough that Jensen’s starting to wish he was back in bed by the time Jared comes out, dragging a huge bundle of bamboo and a milk crate. A cheer goes up from the crowd, and Jared grins and gives a bow. He catches Jensen’s eye as he’s pouring honey over the crate, a special treat for Monty. Not that anyone else in the crowd knows he’s called Monty. Jensen smiles back.
Jared doesn’t look sad today. He’s doing his job, the thing that he loves. And all these people love it too. Jared heads inside and the panda wanders out to investigate the crate, lapping at the honey with hungry concentration as the crowd coos its approval. Jensen’s grateful that he’s here, with the panda and all these strangers and Jared. He watches Monty with his head in the crate, chasing every last drop of honey with his tongue, doesn’t notice Jared behind him until Jared settles a hand on Jensen’s hip.
“He’s beautiful, isn’t he?” says Jared quietly.
“He is,” Jensen agrees.
“He’s gonna be a great dad.”
“He’s gonna be the best panda he can be.”
The crowd shifts around them, and they watch in silence as Monty finishes with the honey and moves onto his bamboo.
“I’m glad we got to know him,” Jensen says finally, and Jared smiles into his hair.
“Me, too.” Jared squeezes his hip. “We’re actually pretty lucky, you and me.”
Monty bites into another stalk of bamboo and Jensen nods, thinking back to that first nerve-wracking day at the zoo. “We are.”
♥
Title: Farewell, Monty
Fandom: CWRPF AU
Pairing: Jared/Jensen
Rating: G for pandas
Summary: The zoo's littlest panda is going away, and Jared is going to miss him. Jensen listens.
Notes: Follows this and this. Unbetaed. 800 words.
Jensen hasn’t seen Jared cry before. Jared is generally the happiest person Jensen has ever met, which makes it all the more jarring to let himself him into Jared’s apartment and find Jared hunched over on the couch, head in his hands, sniffling. “Hey,” he says, looking up, and his voice is thick and his eyes are red, like he’s been at this awhile.
“Hey,” replies Jensen, frozen on the spot with his heart thundering in his ears because whatever made Jared cry like this has to be something pretty awful. And what does Jensen know about giving comfort in the face of awful things? He starts to ask, “Are you okay?” but he realizes how stupid that is before the words are out of his mouth. Jared is looking at him like Jensen is going to say exactly the right thing at any moment, but Jensen can’t. Instead he sits down, puts his arm around Jared’s shoulders, and waits. Jared rubs a wet cheek against the side of Jensen’s neck and sniffles quietly.
After a while with Jensen stroking the soft hair at the nape of his neck, Jared says, “Monty’s going away.”
Jensen feels almost sick with relief, but at the same time he knows how much Jared cares about the pandas, how closely he watches over them. “I’m so sorry,” he whispers, mouth against the tip of Jared’s ear.
“It’s not like we didn’t know… I mean, it was always a loan, and there was always going to be an end, but…” Jared draws in a shaky breath. “I’ve been taking care of him since he was little. I watched him grow up. He helped me ask you out.”
“You didn’t need any help with that.”
“I’m gonna miss him.”
Jensen leans back against the arm of the couch, tugs Jared in to lie against him, a heavy weight against his chest, Jared’s hair getting into his mouth like it always does. “I know you will. I bet he’ll miss you, too.”
Jared hitches out a new sob. “He’ll be happy, you know. The research station has way more pandas than we do. He’ll have friends. He’ll get to have babies. I bet he’ll like that. But it’s still… China’s so far away. And he’s an American citizen. That’s how it works. He was born here, so that makes him an American.”
“I think that only works for people.”
“He’s not ours,” says Jared, and he sounds heartbroken. “We have to have a press conference tomorrow, and I have to not, you know.” He gestures at himself. “Diplomacy, whatever.”
“You can do it,” Jensen says. “You know this’ll be good for Monty. You just have to remember that.”
Jared takes a shaky breath. “Yeah. Yeah, it’ll be good for him.” He fits himself more closely into Jensen’s arms, spinning out stories about Monty’s life at the zoo until he’s laughing instead of crying.
***
Jensen watched the panda cam before he ever met Jared, and he - like the rest of the city - took proprietary joy in watching Monty grow up. But he doesn’t quite understand how huge a deal it is until he goes to the zoo’s farewell celebration and sees the crowd in front of the panda habitat, hears two women comparing their collections of panda pictures. It’s nine on a Saturday morning, cold enough that Jensen’s starting to wish he was back in bed by the time Jared comes out, dragging a huge bundle of bamboo and a milk crate. A cheer goes up from the crowd, and Jared grins and gives a bow. He catches Jensen’s eye as he’s pouring honey over the crate, a special treat for Monty. Not that anyone else in the crowd knows he’s called Monty. Jensen smiles back.
Jared doesn’t look sad today. He’s doing his job, the thing that he loves. And all these people love it too. Jared heads inside and the panda wanders out to investigate the crate, lapping at the honey with hungry concentration as the crowd coos its approval. Jensen’s grateful that he’s here, with the panda and all these strangers and Jared. He watches Monty with his head in the crate, chasing every last drop of honey with his tongue, doesn’t notice Jared behind him until Jared settles a hand on Jensen’s hip.
“He’s beautiful, isn’t he?” says Jared quietly.
“He is,” Jensen agrees.
“He’s gonna be a great dad.”
“He’s gonna be the best panda he can be.”
The crowd shifts around them, and they watch in silence as Monty finishes with the honey and moves onto his bamboo.
“I’m glad we got to know him,” Jensen says finally, and Jared smiles into his hair.
“Me, too.” Jared squeezes his hip. “We’re actually pretty lucky, you and me.”
Monty bites into another stalk of bamboo and Jensen nods, thinking back to that first nerve-wracking day at the zoo. “We are.”
♥