*Merry Christmas*
God bless us - every one
this christmas was lame, at best. even the weather blew chunks. It just never really felt like christmas. Even as I was wrapping up the last of my presents yesterday before I left town... I just didn't feel myself getting into the holiday spirit. It felt more like christmas around thanksgiving when I bought my tree and started playing christmas music in the car on the way to work.
I drove in to P-burgh and got to my cousins' around 4 - watch the steelers oblitorate the browns - and we had dinner. we opened some gifts and then went to their christmas eve service. This was nowhere near like covenant's christmas eve service. it was the tiniest church in the world and there were about 30 people in attendance - there's like about 1000 at my church. then mom and i drove home (my family usually drives around and looks at christmas lights after church). we got home and i opened my stocking. but mom didn't even wrap the stocking stuffers this year. so i was just pulling crap out of a giant sock!
I got up today around 8 and we had a big breakfast and my dad was bitching about the fact that i wanted eggs and bacon, but he had to make pancakes bc my aunt was coming over... of course she gets there and wants eggs anyway, but he was bitching and moaning and being down right indignant to my mother. All the while i'm trying not to harbor contempt and hatred for this man, because after all it's christmas. but after all my poor mother has been through he treats her like a piece of shit; not his wife of 30-some years.
we went into the living room to open presents and my mom didn't even join us. there was tension galore. if my aunt hadn't been there i would've ripped into him. my dad got like 15 gifts for my aunt and one little cheap $3 address book for my mom. (which was also one of the 15 gifts my aunt got)
she even got more than i did. I got some little magnetic note pad for the fridge (ugly, but he tries) a flashlight - which was left over from last christmas... my mom buys 8 of everything and gives them away to everyone. a kitchen appliance, and a radio transmitter for my mp3 player - which was the one thing i actually asked for and got... so that was pretty cool!
i'm not greedy, and christmas is not about giving gifts, but i always put so much thought into each person and each gift and I never feel like anyone does that for me. My brother and Mel gave me a $50 check. They gave my aunt a $50 gift certificate to Banana. Why couldn't i have gotten a gift certificate? A check is so impersonal. I'm kinda nervous to see what beth got me. she's the one person whos gifts i always look forward to. last year she disappointed me with money... so hopefully that doesn't happen this year.
oy le vey. I think next year I am just going to make my own plans. maybe pretend like i can't make it out to hermitville and just tag along with someone in york... perhaps a bf. I just really hate my family right now. I never really felt like I fit in, but now I feel like they think that too and just go about their lives and forget all about me.
yeah, merry christmas. now I can see why people are always getting depressed this time of year. Costanza had it right. we really should use this season to sit everyone down and tell them all the ways that they have disappointed us over the past year!
this christmas was lame, at best. even the weather blew chunks. It just never really felt like christmas. Even as I was wrapping up the last of my presents yesterday before I left town... I just didn't feel myself getting into the holiday spirit. It felt more like christmas around thanksgiving when I bought my tree and started playing christmas music in the car on the way to work.
I drove in to P-burgh and got to my cousins' around 4 - watch the steelers oblitorate the browns - and we had dinner. we opened some gifts and then went to their christmas eve service. This was nowhere near like covenant's christmas eve service. it was the tiniest church in the world and there were about 30 people in attendance - there's like about 1000 at my church. then mom and i drove home (my family usually drives around and looks at christmas lights after church). we got home and i opened my stocking. but mom didn't even wrap the stocking stuffers this year. so i was just pulling crap out of a giant sock!
I got up today around 8 and we had a big breakfast and my dad was bitching about the fact that i wanted eggs and bacon, but he had to make pancakes bc my aunt was coming over... of course she gets there and wants eggs anyway, but he was bitching and moaning and being down right indignant to my mother. All the while i'm trying not to harbor contempt and hatred for this man, because after all it's christmas. but after all my poor mother has been through he treats her like a piece of shit; not his wife of 30-some years.
we went into the living room to open presents and my mom didn't even join us. there was tension galore. if my aunt hadn't been there i would've ripped into him. my dad got like 15 gifts for my aunt and one little cheap $3 address book for my mom. (which was also one of the 15 gifts my aunt got)
she even got more than i did. I got some little magnetic note pad for the fridge (ugly, but he tries) a flashlight - which was left over from last christmas... my mom buys 8 of everything and gives them away to everyone. a kitchen appliance, and a radio transmitter for my mp3 player - which was the one thing i actually asked for and got... so that was pretty cool!
i'm not greedy, and christmas is not about giving gifts, but i always put so much thought into each person and each gift and I never feel like anyone does that for me. My brother and Mel gave me a $50 check. They gave my aunt a $50 gift certificate to Banana. Why couldn't i have gotten a gift certificate? A check is so impersonal. I'm kinda nervous to see what beth got me. she's the one person whos gifts i always look forward to. last year she disappointed me with money... so hopefully that doesn't happen this year.
oy le vey. I think next year I am just going to make my own plans. maybe pretend like i can't make it out to hermitville and just tag along with someone in york... perhaps a bf. I just really hate my family right now. I never really felt like I fit in, but now I feel like they think that too and just go about their lives and forget all about me.
yeah, merry christmas. now I can see why people are always getting depressed this time of year. Costanza had it right. we really should use this season to sit everyone down and tell them all the ways that they have disappointed us over the past year!