Give and Take my foot.
This is an angry rant...get ready.
Sometimes, although I love being me, and helping people makes me very happy...sometimes, like right now, I get tired of people. I hate it when I help someone, like "Here is exactly what you were looking for to make your life easier", and they're like "thanks but no thanks". No, really...take it, because you're going to want it later, and wished you had taken the help when it was offered to you. I hate how I go out of my way to make sure people feel good, check in, even just to say hello and pretty much NObody does that for me. When my loved ones are upset, I listen, I give advice and I do the best I absolutely can to make them fell 100% better. Why is there NOBODY in my life that can give that to me. That's what friends are for, right? Then where were my friends, when I was going through a terrible time, when my friend killed himself, and my uncle died. I was alone, and really upset and I had nobody to talk to. Even then, I put mySELF aside, and still took the care to make sure that people around me were doing alright otherwise. I know that most of the time I'm perfectly awesome, and my life is a perfect ride...but even so, it is nice to get a "Hey Rebecca, what's going on in your life these days?" kind of query. I am one extremely busy individual, and I know that my friends are busy as well (some more so than others, some less than they consider themselves to be), but it goes beyond that. It is about selflessness and caring for people around you, and the people you love who care about you. It makes me really sad sometimes when my mother asks me who I talk to about my problems, should any arise, and I really feel like I have no one, like really. There are people I talk to that hear that I'm saying and then start to go on about themselves, and how their problems are so much worse. However, that's pretty rude and I don't need that. I just want some give and take in my world...not all giving. I love to give love, and I don't do it to get it in return...but it is nice when it actually happens, especially being as rare as it is these days. I don't want people to be all "Oh Rebecca, you can talk to me anytime", because there's nothing I need. I've always been one to work out my shit in my own quiet, in my head kind of way without burdening other people. I just wish that selflessness were more of a hot trend, I guess. People these days are so egocentric, and one day will realize that it pays to care. I hope.
Sorry. Had to.
God dammit, I love the Howes.
Sometimes, although I love being me, and helping people makes me very happy...sometimes, like right now, I get tired of people. I hate it when I help someone, like "Here is exactly what you were looking for to make your life easier", and they're like "thanks but no thanks". No, really...take it, because you're going to want it later, and wished you had taken the help when it was offered to you. I hate how I go out of my way to make sure people feel good, check in, even just to say hello and pretty much NObody does that for me. When my loved ones are upset, I listen, I give advice and I do the best I absolutely can to make them fell 100% better. Why is there NOBODY in my life that can give that to me. That's what friends are for, right? Then where were my friends, when I was going through a terrible time, when my friend killed himself, and my uncle died. I was alone, and really upset and I had nobody to talk to. Even then, I put mySELF aside, and still took the care to make sure that people around me were doing alright otherwise. I know that most of the time I'm perfectly awesome, and my life is a perfect ride...but even so, it is nice to get a "Hey Rebecca, what's going on in your life these days?" kind of query. I am one extremely busy individual, and I know that my friends are busy as well (some more so than others, some less than they consider themselves to be), but it goes beyond that. It is about selflessness and caring for people around you, and the people you love who care about you. It makes me really sad sometimes when my mother asks me who I talk to about my problems, should any arise, and I really feel like I have no one, like really. There are people I talk to that hear that I'm saying and then start to go on about themselves, and how their problems are so much worse. However, that's pretty rude and I don't need that. I just want some give and take in my world...not all giving. I love to give love, and I don't do it to get it in return...but it is nice when it actually happens, especially being as rare as it is these days. I don't want people to be all "Oh Rebecca, you can talk to me anytime", because there's nothing I need. I've always been one to work out my shit in my own quiet, in my head kind of way without burdening other people. I just wish that selflessness were more of a hot trend, I guess. People these days are so egocentric, and one day will realize that it pays to care. I hope.
Sorry. Had to.
God dammit, I love the Howes.