I Hate Loving You, You Love Hating Me (Part 20)
I hope everyone enjoys this chapter. I just want to let you know that this is the penultimate chapter so next one's going to be the last... dun dun dun! ;D
It's not an overly long update, but I hope you love it all the same, or should I say hate it? ( See what I did there?;) )
Please comment as I love hearing what you guys think!:) xx
What on earth is Sophie thinking? Where did all of this come from?
"I think you're fucking out of your mind." I tell her. I don't care if I sound cold.
"Okay, erm... Not exactly the reaction I was hoping for." She says. Hoping for? What exactly was she hoping for me to do? Pounce on her, rip all of her clothes off then confess my undying love for her? Nope, I don't think so. As appealing as the majority of that sounds- Sian! Stop it!
"Well how do you expect me to react exactly Sophie? We had our reasons for breaking up and looking back on it, it was for the best. We were constantly arguing, fighting and screaming. And when we weren't, you were always either out or too busy working to acknowledge my existence. And my god, I can't count the amount of plates I've smashed trying to throw them at you-"
"I love you." Her outburst stuns me to silence. It's not just her words, but it's the way she's looking into my eyes with such certainty, as if she would bet her life on those three words. The three words that I hadn't heard her say to me with such sincerity since several months before we broke up. The three words that, if you ask me, could have saved our relationship long before it was too late.
I ignore the butterflies in the pit of my stomach and the sound of my heart practically pounding out of my chest. My heart trying to argue against all logical thoughts from my brain. But if I've learned anything in my lifetime it's that if you don't want to get hurt, you're brains the one you've got to follow.
"You don't mean that." I say, trying to act as nonchalant as I can.
"Try me."
"Sophie-"
"I love you Sian." She interrupts. "I mean, sure I hate how stubborn you can be, but I love how you never let anyone tell you what to do, and you never let what anyone says stop you from being yourself . I hate how lazy you can be, but I love your carefree attitude and it's what I envy most about you. I hate how you always take more than half the covers, but let me tell you, even having all the covers to myself doesn't stop me from feeling cold when you're not there next to me. You've got such an annoying, immature side that I can't help but find adorably cute and childish. You have such a bitchy, sarcastic side to you but I love that soppy side to you that I know I'm the only one who gets to see. I know I would be completely lost without you. Please Sian, if we gave it another shot I think it would work."
"Soph-" I go to speak but my voice breaks slightly with emotion as I feel my eyes fill with tears. She completely caught me off guard. "I... I don't know..."
"Pleaaaase Sian?" Sophie pouts her lip.
"That doesn't work on me anymore you know." I lie.
"You're lying."
"What? How-"
"Sian I've lived with you for three years. I know when you're lying."
"How?" I ask amused.
"You think I'm telling you that? No way, then you'll try and stop doing what you do when you lie."
"What do I do when I lie?" I ask confused, to which she just taps her finger on her nose and winks. "Sophie!" I exclaim as she giggles slightly.
"So?" She asks, her voice immediately taking on a serious tone again.
"I really don't know Sophie, I mean... Yeah I'm sure it would be great for a few days, a week tops. But... then we'd go home and you'd go back to work and then eventually things would just fall into the same dull routine as they used to and we'd just go back to the fighting, and the shouting. And you'd never be in and you'd always be too busy and-"
"Sian I promise you, you come first. Do you really think I'm going to make any of the same mistakes again? We'll both try more, okay? I promise to put you first more, and maybe you can do some cleaning, you know... focus on washing some dishes rather than throwing them around."
"Noooo way Soph! I am not I repeat not cleaning!" I complain as she raises her eyebrows. "Sophie did you not just tell me that you love how I don't let what anyone tell me what to do? And that you love my carefree attitude?" I question raising one eyebrow.
"Yeah, well... That was just another way of saying you're a stubborn, lazy bitch but I love you anyway." She jokes.
"Cheeky bitch!" I exclaim laughing.
"So...?" Sophie asks.
"So..." I trail off.
"Are we gonna, you know... Give it another shot?" She asks nervously.
"I, erm... I guess we could." I say awkwardly as we both look at each other and giggle at how pathetic we're being.
"So, are we like..." Sophie says jokingly
"Don't say it!" I exclaim dramatically. "...Going out?" I ask as neither of us can contain our laughter at our reenactment of the first time we got together. "We're insane... I can't believe you actually remember that!"
"'Course I do!" She replies. "Oh... Sian?" She asks looking at me seriously.
"What?" I inquire.
"I... I can't wait to see you again and... I've not even left yet." She mocks in a high pitched, overly girly voice.
"Oi! Webster you better not be taking the piss of me! And besides I didn't even say it like that."
"I didn't even say it like that." She imitates in the same irritating voice.
"I do not talk like that!" I argue.
"I do not talk like that!"
"Piss off."
"Piss-"
"Right that's it!" I interrupt as I tackle her to the floor, tickling all of her weak spots.
"Ahh! Sian... No... Please... I'm sorry... Eeeeek!" She squeals between bursts of laughter.
"Tell me I'm amazing." I smirk.
"What? no wa- aaaah, ah, okay. Okay Sian, you're amazing... Please." She giggles as I stop tickling her and sit up slightly. I lean forward again, pecking her lips. As I pull out I feel her hand on the back of my head as she pulls me back down and recaptures my lips. The kiss is slow and gentle, yet so passionate. I'm just trying to take it all in. These lips that I've missed so much.
"Sian?" She mumbles against my lips.
"Yeah?"
"You know how we're back together and stuff? That doesn't mean I have to get you a good birthday present now, does it?"
"Oh absolutely." I reply, grinning.
"What? But your birthday... That's in like... three days!" She exclaims.
"Better get thinking of what to buy me then then, darling." I wink.
"I really do hate you sometimes, you know that, right?" She giggles.
"Trust me Soph, the feeling's mutual." I reply before capturing her lips yet again.