be afraid of the cold; they'll inherit your blood, pt. i: torrent (jasper) pg13
title: be afraid of the cold; they'll inherit your blood, pt. i: torrent
fandom: twilight
character(s)/pairing(s): jasper pov; the cullens + bella, canon pairings
rating: pg13
word count: 2682
spoilers: twilight au.
notes: this is part one of five 'times bella never got turned into a vampire'. my foray into 1st person, to see if i could work through my issues with it. title and opening quote (translated) from regina spektor's 'apres moi.'
summary: au. jasper decides to kill the human girl after edward stupidly saves her from the skidding van. it does not go as planned.
February. Get ink, shed tears.
Write of it, sob your heart out, sing.
While torrential slush that roars,
Burns in the blackness of the spring.-
“Ap`res Moi”, Regina Spektor
i. torrent
A Cullen family meeting had never felt so much like a round of troops discussing strategy, tempers high and tension tight like my decades spent rounding up immortal troops with Maria.
“I won’t let Alice live in danger, even a slight danger. You don’t feel about anyone the way I feel about her, Edward, and you haven’t lived through what I’ve lived through, whether you’ve seen my memories or not. You don’t understand.”
I thought of the scars on my neck, then of the perfectly pale, unmarred skin on Alice’s, and even the thought of any harm coming to her made my spine stiffen.
“I’m not disputing that, Jasper. But I’m telling you now, I won’t let you hurt Isabella Swan.”
I could feel his determination in the solid force of slate grey around him. Even though I knew I could probably take him in a fight, I tried not to think the words. Edward was my brother, not the enemy.
“Jazz.” Alice’s voice filtered into my thoughts. I felt unwilling to turn away, an instinct left over from years in the south spent watching my back every moment, but I looked over at her after a second of unease.
“Don’t bother telling me you can protect yourself, Alice. I already know that. I’ve still got to-“
Words of safeguarding and husbandly duties died on my tongue as she spoke about her prophecy of the human girl and her as friends. The vision, it… complicated matters. I reeled away from the notion of hurting Alice that way, by depriving her of the companion she sought. I knew she was content in our life and this family, but I could also sense her longing. She had only a predilection for shopping in common with Rosalie; she was very fond of Esme but she considered the woman to be more a mother she never had than her friend.
And then there was her vision of Edward falling in love with the girl.
It would be an understatement to say I was stunned. We tried not to get too involved with the humans that we came in contact with. Far too dangerous. I was still pondering the puzzle of Isabella Swan as I scaled a mountainous fir tree and settled on one of its boughs. Maybe there was something about this human, this girl…
Edward’s actions confounded me. He couldn’t yet be so in love with her to have lost all sense of reason. If anyone ever found out the truth behind his miraculous rescue-
The Volturri drifted unbidden into my thoughts. I had only had two run-ins with the ancient monarchs, once during a close call with Maria and again during my time with Carlisle. Despite the fact that the situations had been worlds apart, I only sensed one emotion from them: greed. Greed for power, greed for violence. They could be counted on to kill us all if we slipped. I respected their duty to keep order, but feared what would become of us if they deemed our family in the way of that chore. Did Alice’s promise that everything would be fine include them as well?
I couldn’t be sure. And that there was the thought that propelled me back down the tree, through the forest swiftly.
The Swans’ house was quaint, large enough for two people but perhaps not if those two people didn’t really know each other. I remembered her emotions on that first day, how her fear had been turned inward, not outward towards those who could judge her. It was curious; I’d never traveled alone when I was human, always joined with the friends who had enlisted in the war alongside me. I used the question to distract myself from making any decisions as I crept up to the back door, listening silently to the girl arguing on the phone with someone. I only heard one heartbeat; her father must have returned to work. That was good, I told myself. No more blood spilt than necessary.
I tested the air around her as I slid an unlocked window open on the first floor. There was frustration there, yes, but also an odd mixture of patience and affection. Her and her mother, I gathered from the context of the call, must have a strange relationship. She talked her mother in circles over the issue of returning home, her tone holding the same emotions as that my ability indicated was emanating from the rest of her. More like friends, or a parent communicating with a small child than the other way around. Very odd indeed.
Bella hung up with her mother, the plastic click of the end button followed quickly by the sound of the phone being set down. I crept up the staircase quickly, not sure if the call would be followed by a trip into the hall and not wanting to be discovered until I chose to be.
Her emotions were a mess, shrouded by irritation and confusion. But the underscore of concentration and curiosity was most troubling, I decided. I didn’t need Edward’s mind-reading ability to tell me she was contemplating my suddenly-impulsive brother and his less-than-human antics. I was making the right choice, I nodded to myself, stealing my body tight against the opposite wall. Best end this before everyone got too involved to back out.
But as the girl rose from her bed and made her way toward her door, closer to me, her scent hit me full on. I found it difficult to believe she could be more appealing to Edward than she was to me. But if she was, I was in awe of his restraint. These thoughts, of course, retreated to the logical portion of my brain the second she was in sight, and I could make out the faint throbbing of her jugular. She hadn’t spotted me yet, that much was obvious by the relaxed set of her shoulders and even tempo of her heart.
One taste, I decided, wouldn’t do any harm. To kill her without it would be like setting food out in the sun to spoil. A waste by any standards.
I hadn’t realized I was gripping the doorframe in my hand until it splintered in my palm, a second before the sound reached Bella’s ears as well. I could have bolted, hidden in the closet like some guilty adolescent, but for whatever reason I remained. I watched in fascination as her heart rate spiked, her eyes widening as they darted to my menacing figure.
She took a quick step away, and it wasn’t even until she was falling that I noticed she had been standing at the top of the stairs.
The rest of the staircase was hidden from my view, but I could certainly hear the thump of her body hitting the plane and angle of each step, the crunch of bones and slap of skin as she broke like the fragile human she was. I had barely a moment of wallowing in pity for the girl, lying twisted as she was at the bottom of the stairs, before the scent of her blood pooling on the floor hit me and all rational thought was lost.
The next thing I knew, a strong grip was tearing me away from Bella’s body, teeth torn unjustly from her throat before I’d had my fill. I struggled valiantly, but there were two and I was blinded by bloodlust, my vision streaked in red and eyes for only one thing. But my thrashing grew weaker as I came back to myself, until the point where I could identify one of my assailants as Emmett and the other as Rosalie. I stilled.
“What-“
“Carlisle! What should I do?” Edward’s frantic voice pierced once and for all through my haze, and I suddenly became aware of the human girl convulsing a few feet from where I was being held. Well that wasn’t what I’d intended at all.
He turned to snarl at my thoughts.
“I’m sorry, son.” Carlisle spoke gravely, and Alice rested her hands on Edward’s shoulders. Somehow he was keeping it together, despite the fact that his hands were practically dripping in Bella’s blood. His will would always be stronger than mine, I realized. “There’s nothing more you or I can do. The change… it’s to the point of no return.”
He hung his head limply, his face crumpling as if in true agony.
But then he swung towards me, and Alice’s comforting hands became restraints.
“You did this to her.”
I nodded, no point in denying it.
“To keep us safe.”
To clean up your mess, I thought but didn’t say, yet the effect was much the same as if I had spoken the words aloud.
And I didn’t need to make use of my gift for him to share in my guilt.
(врезаться)
Bella’s change took nearly four days; blood loss equaled less liquid to pump the venom into her system, and therefore a more drawn out transformation. I cursed myself for the poor planning and lack of self-restraint that caused the girl even more pain. Lord knew she didn’t deserve it.
I waited by her bed like a doctor with no medicine, a soldier with no war or weapons to fight, an angel with no God or a demon with no sin.
Edward had disappeared along with his guilt the second after he’d deposited her on his bed. And I guess that would always be the difference between us: he might have the willpower to restrain himself, but he couldn’t deal with the consequences if he ever gave in to his whims.
Her vampire eyes open eighty-six hours and twelve minutes after her human eyelids had closed, and I have only two seconds to ponder a correlation between their dark color and her blood-loss before I drop to my knees.
It’s as if a piece of my person, of my soul (if that’s even still there) is being wrenched away from me. I gasp once it’s gone, leaving a purely metaphorical gaping wound inside of me, and I look up at the terrifyingly beautiful girl standing above me.
“You feel guilty.” She states plainly, her head cocked to the side.
I nod weakly, trying to gain my bearings. She crouches down in one fluid movement.
“But it’s more than that. You’re…” she trails off, searching. And if I hadn’t done the same so many times before, if I hadn’t ever tasted the mood around someone, trying to gain insight, I don’t think I would have been able to tell what she was doing. But I was reminded and the hole inside me ached. “You’re relieved.”
She regards me curiously, void of anger, the emotion I would have expected. Part of me was waiting here for my execution.
And then she’s grinning. “And now you’re confused. That’s okay. You wouldn’t be the first.” But then she trails a single finger down my cheek and I’m all too aware how much stronger than me she is at this moment. “But tell me why you’re relieved.” There’s something in her otherwise-light tone that suggests it isn’t a request.
“Because maybe there’ll finally be someone else in this family that just doesn’t belong.”
Bella nods, standing just as quickly as she’d bent down. And then she’s gone.
I hear Alice gasp downstairs, her choke as the same effect Bella had on me affects her as well. Yet, even as I think through the connection, I feel my gift return to me, seeping back into the chasm within my chest. Suddenly, I can feel her confused panic instead of just listen to it.
“Alice!” I holler as I streak down the stairs, afraid for her far more than for myself.
“I’m going to love you someday,” I hear Bella repeat behind me as I take Alice’s shoulders in my hands, searching her face for signs of pain. But she’s only shaken.
“Yes.”
Bella grins; I see it reflected in the shine of Alice’s eyes as she mirrors the expression.
“I like that.”
When I finally turn, I see Bella clutched to Rosalie’s side while the blonde flutters over her like a mother hen over her chick. I’m suddenly struck by the irony that not a week ago Rosalie had been pleading for the same girl’s death. I snort.
Rosalie barely has time to glare at me before Bella’s head snaps up, her gaze speculative.
“You wanted me dead too.” But Rosalie has only shrunk back a bare millimeter, surprisingly guilty, before Bella shakes her head. “That’s okay; I understand.”
I connect the behavior to the ability only a moment before Edward appears at the back door, looking pained. She’s drained him as well.
“Well, aren’t you just the prodigal son returning only after the smoke has cleared. Have a nice mope, did you?” Rosalie sneers, back into protective mode now that she’s been forgiven for her own hand in Bella’s change. She must have figured Bella had done the same for me, or else parts of me would be flung all over the house already.
“Rosalie.” I’m surprised by the even base-line of Bella’s voice, and how she doesn’t even stutter now that everyone’s eyes are on her. The shy part of her must have died along with her heart. “Leave him be.”
I can feel a tug on that essence that had been stolen before, but it’s only for the faintest moment in which her eyes flash to mine, a thank you for borrowing, before she returns to her sentence. “He feels guilty enough as it is.”
“What’re you…” Rosalie questions, eyeing me, then Alice and finally Bella. “How are you doing that?”
Bella grins slyly.
“I’m a black hole.” She turns to Carlisle, who’s suddenly appeared at the bottom of the stairs. “Isn’t that right?”
Carlisle’s expression is concentrated. “I suppose that’s one way of putting it.”
Bella’s gaze turns sharply on Edward, her eyes narrowing.
“What was that? Your thoughts were too scattered for me to keep up.”
He stares back, broken, and if he’s surprised that she can hear his thoughts and he can hear no one’s but his own, he doesn’t show it.
“I’m sorry. For what I did to you. This is my fault.” His eyes meet mine. “Even if it wasn’t my teeth.”
But to my surprise Bella merely rolls her eyes.
“Please. You’re always looking for excuses for self-flagellation. You think you’re a monster, that you don’t deserve to be happy because of the terrible things you’ve done. Well, don’t count on me to help you out with that little pity-party.”
Bella sits down with finality on the couch, facing away from Edward with her arms crossed.
Emmett stifles a laugh and Rosalie doesn’t both to, throwing herself down beside Bella.
“Lucky you, Edward. You’ve finally found the only person who could make you feel like shit by not making you feel like shit. It’s fate, really.”
Bella giggles, like it was some inside joke, which it might as well have been. She knows Edward better now than any of us could in our half-century of history living among each other. Fate indeed.
But there is some part of me that aches as I watch Rosalie and Bella talk, Alice skittering past me to sit on the newest addition’s other side. Bella fits. She belongs, and if I have to guess, the contentment wafting off of her in gentle waves is due to the fact that she hadn’t felt that in her human family. Her old family. Even Edward drifts closer, like a magnet to metal or a moth enraptured by a flame. Boy is toast.
And I remain. Forever on the outskirts.
“Jasper?” My distant gaze flickers to hers, finding not pity but encouragement in her deep red stare. Acceptance. She tilts her head to the chair opposite her. “Come sit?”
And it’s a question because it really is my choice. Stay or leave. Inside or outside. To belong or to shun.
I take a deep breath and head for the chair.
pt. ii >>
fandom: twilight
character(s)/pairing(s): jasper pov; the cullens + bella, canon pairings
rating: pg13
word count: 2682
spoilers: twilight au.
notes: this is part one of five 'times bella never got turned into a vampire'. my foray into 1st person, to see if i could work through my issues with it. title and opening quote (translated) from regina spektor's 'apres moi.'
summary: au. jasper decides to kill the human girl after edward stupidly saves her from the skidding van. it does not go as planned.
February. Get ink, shed tears.
Write of it, sob your heart out, sing.
While torrential slush that roars,
Burns in the blackness of the spring.-
“Ap`res Moi”, Regina Spektor
i. torrent
A Cullen family meeting had never felt so much like a round of troops discussing strategy, tempers high and tension tight like my decades spent rounding up immortal troops with Maria.
“I won’t let Alice live in danger, even a slight danger. You don’t feel about anyone the way I feel about her, Edward, and you haven’t lived through what I’ve lived through, whether you’ve seen my memories or not. You don’t understand.”
I thought of the scars on my neck, then of the perfectly pale, unmarred skin on Alice’s, and even the thought of any harm coming to her made my spine stiffen.
“I’m not disputing that, Jasper. But I’m telling you now, I won’t let you hurt Isabella Swan.”
I could feel his determination in the solid force of slate grey around him. Even though I knew I could probably take him in a fight, I tried not to think the words. Edward was my brother, not the enemy.
“Jazz.” Alice’s voice filtered into my thoughts. I felt unwilling to turn away, an instinct left over from years in the south spent watching my back every moment, but I looked over at her after a second of unease.
“Don’t bother telling me you can protect yourself, Alice. I already know that. I’ve still got to-“
Words of safeguarding and husbandly duties died on my tongue as she spoke about her prophecy of the human girl and her as friends. The vision, it… complicated matters. I reeled away from the notion of hurting Alice that way, by depriving her of the companion she sought. I knew she was content in our life and this family, but I could also sense her longing. She had only a predilection for shopping in common with Rosalie; she was very fond of Esme but she considered the woman to be more a mother she never had than her friend.
And then there was her vision of Edward falling in love with the girl.
It would be an understatement to say I was stunned. We tried not to get too involved with the humans that we came in contact with. Far too dangerous. I was still pondering the puzzle of Isabella Swan as I scaled a mountainous fir tree and settled on one of its boughs. Maybe there was something about this human, this girl…
Edward’s actions confounded me. He couldn’t yet be so in love with her to have lost all sense of reason. If anyone ever found out the truth behind his miraculous rescue-
The Volturri drifted unbidden into my thoughts. I had only had two run-ins with the ancient monarchs, once during a close call with Maria and again during my time with Carlisle. Despite the fact that the situations had been worlds apart, I only sensed one emotion from them: greed. Greed for power, greed for violence. They could be counted on to kill us all if we slipped. I respected their duty to keep order, but feared what would become of us if they deemed our family in the way of that chore. Did Alice’s promise that everything would be fine include them as well?
I couldn’t be sure. And that there was the thought that propelled me back down the tree, through the forest swiftly.
The Swans’ house was quaint, large enough for two people but perhaps not if those two people didn’t really know each other. I remembered her emotions on that first day, how her fear had been turned inward, not outward towards those who could judge her. It was curious; I’d never traveled alone when I was human, always joined with the friends who had enlisted in the war alongside me. I used the question to distract myself from making any decisions as I crept up to the back door, listening silently to the girl arguing on the phone with someone. I only heard one heartbeat; her father must have returned to work. That was good, I told myself. No more blood spilt than necessary.
I tested the air around her as I slid an unlocked window open on the first floor. There was frustration there, yes, but also an odd mixture of patience and affection. Her and her mother, I gathered from the context of the call, must have a strange relationship. She talked her mother in circles over the issue of returning home, her tone holding the same emotions as that my ability indicated was emanating from the rest of her. More like friends, or a parent communicating with a small child than the other way around. Very odd indeed.
Bella hung up with her mother, the plastic click of the end button followed quickly by the sound of the phone being set down. I crept up the staircase quickly, not sure if the call would be followed by a trip into the hall and not wanting to be discovered until I chose to be.
Her emotions were a mess, shrouded by irritation and confusion. But the underscore of concentration and curiosity was most troubling, I decided. I didn’t need Edward’s mind-reading ability to tell me she was contemplating my suddenly-impulsive brother and his less-than-human antics. I was making the right choice, I nodded to myself, stealing my body tight against the opposite wall. Best end this before everyone got too involved to back out.
But as the girl rose from her bed and made her way toward her door, closer to me, her scent hit me full on. I found it difficult to believe she could be more appealing to Edward than she was to me. But if she was, I was in awe of his restraint. These thoughts, of course, retreated to the logical portion of my brain the second she was in sight, and I could make out the faint throbbing of her jugular. She hadn’t spotted me yet, that much was obvious by the relaxed set of her shoulders and even tempo of her heart.
One taste, I decided, wouldn’t do any harm. To kill her without it would be like setting food out in the sun to spoil. A waste by any standards.
I hadn’t realized I was gripping the doorframe in my hand until it splintered in my palm, a second before the sound reached Bella’s ears as well. I could have bolted, hidden in the closet like some guilty adolescent, but for whatever reason I remained. I watched in fascination as her heart rate spiked, her eyes widening as they darted to my menacing figure.
She took a quick step away, and it wasn’t even until she was falling that I noticed she had been standing at the top of the stairs.
The rest of the staircase was hidden from my view, but I could certainly hear the thump of her body hitting the plane and angle of each step, the crunch of bones and slap of skin as she broke like the fragile human she was. I had barely a moment of wallowing in pity for the girl, lying twisted as she was at the bottom of the stairs, before the scent of her blood pooling on the floor hit me and all rational thought was lost.
The next thing I knew, a strong grip was tearing me away from Bella’s body, teeth torn unjustly from her throat before I’d had my fill. I struggled valiantly, but there were two and I was blinded by bloodlust, my vision streaked in red and eyes for only one thing. But my thrashing grew weaker as I came back to myself, until the point where I could identify one of my assailants as Emmett and the other as Rosalie. I stilled.
“What-“
“Carlisle! What should I do?” Edward’s frantic voice pierced once and for all through my haze, and I suddenly became aware of the human girl convulsing a few feet from where I was being held. Well that wasn’t what I’d intended at all.
He turned to snarl at my thoughts.
“I’m sorry, son.” Carlisle spoke gravely, and Alice rested her hands on Edward’s shoulders. Somehow he was keeping it together, despite the fact that his hands were practically dripping in Bella’s blood. His will would always be stronger than mine, I realized. “There’s nothing more you or I can do. The change… it’s to the point of no return.”
He hung his head limply, his face crumpling as if in true agony.
But then he swung towards me, and Alice’s comforting hands became restraints.
“You did this to her.”
I nodded, no point in denying it.
“To keep us safe.”
To clean up your mess, I thought but didn’t say, yet the effect was much the same as if I had spoken the words aloud.
And I didn’t need to make use of my gift for him to share in my guilt.
(врезаться)
Bella’s change took nearly four days; blood loss equaled less liquid to pump the venom into her system, and therefore a more drawn out transformation. I cursed myself for the poor planning and lack of self-restraint that caused the girl even more pain. Lord knew she didn’t deserve it.
I waited by her bed like a doctor with no medicine, a soldier with no war or weapons to fight, an angel with no God or a demon with no sin.
Edward had disappeared along with his guilt the second after he’d deposited her on his bed. And I guess that would always be the difference between us: he might have the willpower to restrain himself, but he couldn’t deal with the consequences if he ever gave in to his whims.
Her vampire eyes open eighty-six hours and twelve minutes after her human eyelids had closed, and I have only two seconds to ponder a correlation between their dark color and her blood-loss before I drop to my knees.
It’s as if a piece of my person, of my soul (if that’s even still there) is being wrenched away from me. I gasp once it’s gone, leaving a purely metaphorical gaping wound inside of me, and I look up at the terrifyingly beautiful girl standing above me.
“You feel guilty.” She states plainly, her head cocked to the side.
I nod weakly, trying to gain my bearings. She crouches down in one fluid movement.
“But it’s more than that. You’re…” she trails off, searching. And if I hadn’t done the same so many times before, if I hadn’t ever tasted the mood around someone, trying to gain insight, I don’t think I would have been able to tell what she was doing. But I was reminded and the hole inside me ached. “You’re relieved.”
She regards me curiously, void of anger, the emotion I would have expected. Part of me was waiting here for my execution.
And then she’s grinning. “And now you’re confused. That’s okay. You wouldn’t be the first.” But then she trails a single finger down my cheek and I’m all too aware how much stronger than me she is at this moment. “But tell me why you’re relieved.” There’s something in her otherwise-light tone that suggests it isn’t a request.
“Because maybe there’ll finally be someone else in this family that just doesn’t belong.”
Bella nods, standing just as quickly as she’d bent down. And then she’s gone.
I hear Alice gasp downstairs, her choke as the same effect Bella had on me affects her as well. Yet, even as I think through the connection, I feel my gift return to me, seeping back into the chasm within my chest. Suddenly, I can feel her confused panic instead of just listen to it.
“Alice!” I holler as I streak down the stairs, afraid for her far more than for myself.
“I’m going to love you someday,” I hear Bella repeat behind me as I take Alice’s shoulders in my hands, searching her face for signs of pain. But she’s only shaken.
“Yes.”
Bella grins; I see it reflected in the shine of Alice’s eyes as she mirrors the expression.
“I like that.”
When I finally turn, I see Bella clutched to Rosalie’s side while the blonde flutters over her like a mother hen over her chick. I’m suddenly struck by the irony that not a week ago Rosalie had been pleading for the same girl’s death. I snort.
Rosalie barely has time to glare at me before Bella’s head snaps up, her gaze speculative.
“You wanted me dead too.” But Rosalie has only shrunk back a bare millimeter, surprisingly guilty, before Bella shakes her head. “That’s okay; I understand.”
I connect the behavior to the ability only a moment before Edward appears at the back door, looking pained. She’s drained him as well.
“Well, aren’t you just the prodigal son returning only after the smoke has cleared. Have a nice mope, did you?” Rosalie sneers, back into protective mode now that she’s been forgiven for her own hand in Bella’s change. She must have figured Bella had done the same for me, or else parts of me would be flung all over the house already.
“Rosalie.” I’m surprised by the even base-line of Bella’s voice, and how she doesn’t even stutter now that everyone’s eyes are on her. The shy part of her must have died along with her heart. “Leave him be.”
I can feel a tug on that essence that had been stolen before, but it’s only for the faintest moment in which her eyes flash to mine, a thank you for borrowing, before she returns to her sentence. “He feels guilty enough as it is.”
“What’re you…” Rosalie questions, eyeing me, then Alice and finally Bella. “How are you doing that?”
Bella grins slyly.
“I’m a black hole.” She turns to Carlisle, who’s suddenly appeared at the bottom of the stairs. “Isn’t that right?”
Carlisle’s expression is concentrated. “I suppose that’s one way of putting it.”
Bella’s gaze turns sharply on Edward, her eyes narrowing.
“What was that? Your thoughts were too scattered for me to keep up.”
He stares back, broken, and if he’s surprised that she can hear his thoughts and he can hear no one’s but his own, he doesn’t show it.
“I’m sorry. For what I did to you. This is my fault.” His eyes meet mine. “Even if it wasn’t my teeth.”
But to my surprise Bella merely rolls her eyes.
“Please. You’re always looking for excuses for self-flagellation. You think you’re a monster, that you don’t deserve to be happy because of the terrible things you’ve done. Well, don’t count on me to help you out with that little pity-party.”
Bella sits down with finality on the couch, facing away from Edward with her arms crossed.
Emmett stifles a laugh and Rosalie doesn’t both to, throwing herself down beside Bella.
“Lucky you, Edward. You’ve finally found the only person who could make you feel like shit by not making you feel like shit. It’s fate, really.”
Bella giggles, like it was some inside joke, which it might as well have been. She knows Edward better now than any of us could in our half-century of history living among each other. Fate indeed.
But there is some part of me that aches as I watch Rosalie and Bella talk, Alice skittering past me to sit on the newest addition’s other side. Bella fits. She belongs, and if I have to guess, the contentment wafting off of her in gentle waves is due to the fact that she hadn’t felt that in her human family. Her old family. Even Edward drifts closer, like a magnet to metal or a moth enraptured by a flame. Boy is toast.
And I remain. Forever on the outskirts.
“Jasper?” My distant gaze flickers to hers, finding not pity but encouragement in her deep red stare. Acceptance. She tilts her head to the chair opposite her. “Come sit?”
And it’s a question because it really is my choice. Stay or leave. Inside or outside. To belong or to shun.
I take a deep breath and head for the chair.
pt. ii >>