(no subject)
You know what? I just realized how fucking numb and emotionless I am. It's ridiculous. I used to be able to write so much about how I'm feeling blah blah. I used to be able to rant and all that crap. Nowadays, I don't even bother explaining myself anymore. "Sometimes pretending to be okay is so much easier than explaining why you're not". It actually really explains my life .. I've had so much experiences in my life when I would open up and expose to everyone how I feel and shit, but it got to the point where I just didn't want to anymore because nothing ever went anywhere. Nothing ever got solved. Nothing happens. NOTHING. This is the reason why I don't even bother these days. I've been so accustomed to the fact that problems never get solved properly in my life, that I just find that not caring about it and pushing it aside is better than trying and being unsuccessful, ever. The sad thing is .. I blame only one person for this. Fucking biggest regret of my life .. Here I go again.. Not even gonna bother explaining myself. This is the most I've written about my 'legit feelings' in like .. 2 years.. Wow.