(no subject)
the other day i finished more,now,again by elizabeth wurtzel and now i'm reading a memoir which i think is called skin games. reading things seems like looking in the past but with a clearer head on my shoulders.
on saturday i talked for hours with brie about parenting and flying cars and animals and racism and many other things and it flowed and it felt wonderful to speak with someone who is aware and confident.
i also went downtown that night but the caribana festivities were over, but we still got to have pulled chicken and potatoe pancakes, and kelvin ate corn where as i wanted ice cream but then i remembered i can't have any.
live raggae was playing and it made me feel really good inside.
yesterday i watched an entire season of sex and the city and i enjoyed it very much. sometimes it makes me think of the very simple things which are in front of our faces but not always brought to our attentions.
today we went to honest ed's because i'd never been and i wanted to buy baby clothes and it was hard not to cry. the weather was perfect and we ate outside as a family.
last week i almost called reggie dad while we were at the movies.
tonight i broke a shelf in our fridge.
this morning i woke up to kelvin yelling at julie on the phone.
yesterday afternoon we started to put things in a suitcase for cuba.
simple things like toby hoping make me happy. jake greeting me with kisses and a wagging tail. reading at the picnic tables at toogoodpond. walks at scarborough bluffs, too good, around our neighborhood. library trips.
sometimes i want a new start, other times i know this is just the beginning.
my fingers feel like prunes from washing the dishes.
i haven't e-mailed my mom or dad in a long time, i can't be bothered.
i miss my sister sometimes.
my new favorite sweet is Cho-pan, and inside there are music notes and it says things in a language i cannot read but then in english it says "Chopin" and i wonder if the music notes correctly coincide with one of his symphonies.
on the bathroom counter there are tapes, Mozart, Haydn, Handel and Vivaldi because of me, next to them sits a snoopy hair dryer which i've never used myself.
i haven't cried in a very long time.
it seems i had a lot i wanted to say today. when is it ever enough?
on saturday i talked for hours with brie about parenting and flying cars and animals and racism and many other things and it flowed and it felt wonderful to speak with someone who is aware and confident.
i also went downtown that night but the caribana festivities were over, but we still got to have pulled chicken and potatoe pancakes, and kelvin ate corn where as i wanted ice cream but then i remembered i can't have any.
live raggae was playing and it made me feel really good inside.
yesterday i watched an entire season of sex and the city and i enjoyed it very much. sometimes it makes me think of the very simple things which are in front of our faces but not always brought to our attentions.
today we went to honest ed's because i'd never been and i wanted to buy baby clothes and it was hard not to cry. the weather was perfect and we ate outside as a family.
last week i almost called reggie dad while we were at the movies.
tonight i broke a shelf in our fridge.
this morning i woke up to kelvin yelling at julie on the phone.
yesterday afternoon we started to put things in a suitcase for cuba.
simple things like toby hoping make me happy. jake greeting me with kisses and a wagging tail. reading at the picnic tables at toogoodpond. walks at scarborough bluffs, too good, around our neighborhood. library trips.
sometimes i want a new start, other times i know this is just the beginning.
my fingers feel like prunes from washing the dishes.
i haven't e-mailed my mom or dad in a long time, i can't be bothered.
i miss my sister sometimes.
my new favorite sweet is Cho-pan, and inside there are music notes and it says things in a language i cannot read but then in english it says "Chopin" and i wonder if the music notes correctly coincide with one of his symphonies.
on the bathroom counter there are tapes, Mozart, Haydn, Handel and Vivaldi because of me, next to them sits a snoopy hair dryer which i've never used myself.
i haven't cried in a very long time.
it seems i had a lot i wanted to say today. when is it ever enough?