Kill them all.
I'm tired.
I'm very, very tired.
When I first went to bed an hour ago, I was so tired that I literally could not see straight. Couldn't read the words on my screen. There was music pumping from next door, but all the occupants of that suite had gone out for the night. So I tried to fall asleep to Barbie Girl and Lisa Brown. And I almost succeeded. And then the girls came back. And I thought, "Great, it is three-fucking-a.m., they're gonna turn off the music and go to bed."
Silly Denise.
No.
Instead, I get Humping and Dumping: Coady MacNeil Edition. Outside my door. Against my door. Among the stellar bytes of loud drunken conversation I have overheard in the last half hour have been:
"I'm so, so sorry, but I really can't do this, I kinda totally have a thing for your roommate and I'm so so sorry."
"I will pay you six million dollars to open this door, right now." (N.B. 'this door' being my door)
"What the fuck is a penis proctor? Penis the proctor is on duty, that makes no fucking sense. Is it like a guy named Penis or a giant fucking penis as the proctor?" (Wash, rinse, repeat several more times)
"She is so gonna bang you tonight, dude!"
"Hold on, I'll be right there, I forgot panties!"
And many more.
I just want to sleep. Please, let me sleep.
I'm very, very tired.
When I first went to bed an hour ago, I was so tired that I literally could not see straight. Couldn't read the words on my screen. There was music pumping from next door, but all the occupants of that suite had gone out for the night. So I tried to fall asleep to Barbie Girl and Lisa Brown. And I almost succeeded. And then the girls came back. And I thought, "Great, it is three-fucking-a.m., they're gonna turn off the music and go to bed."
Silly Denise.
No.
Instead, I get Humping and Dumping: Coady MacNeil Edition. Outside my door. Against my door. Among the stellar bytes of loud drunken conversation I have overheard in the last half hour have been:
"I'm so, so sorry, but I really can't do this, I kinda totally have a thing for your roommate and I'm so so sorry."
"I will pay you six million dollars to open this door, right now." (N.B. 'this door' being my door)
"What the fuck is a penis proctor? Penis the proctor is on duty, that makes no fucking sense. Is it like a guy named Penis or a giant fucking penis as the proctor?" (Wash, rinse, repeat several more times)
"She is so gonna bang you tonight, dude!"
"Hold on, I'll be right there, I forgot panties!"
And many more.
I just want to sleep. Please, let me sleep.