(no subject)
Grandparents are leaving at 7am for their month-long visit to florida. I'll be going to bed pretty soon so i can get up in the morning with them before they go. Tomorrow is gonna be a long day. My brain feels foggy. I'm kind of numb today. I'm definitely not as comfortable with numbness as i used to be. It's kind of bizarre. I feel very strange still -- like something is missing. It kind of sucks that substitution is not my thing. It doesn't work for me, nor does distraction, most of the time. I'm not sure why though. Perhaps it has something to do with my mind tending to be rather obsessive and one-track. It is definitely not an easy task living in my head, especially of late.
As an unrelated thought: I've definitely begun to notice how much the absence of obligation and personal risk tends to show a person's true colors. People tend to only act a certain way out of circumstance, rather than personality... or rather circumstance just tends to have more of an influence than internal sources do. People are nice for a reason, and usually not for the right one. That's ok though. Given the circumstances, i should probably not give a shit. I'm gonna work on that... before it drives me crazy. I'm certainly no perfect exception to the ideas in the above paragraph, but i do think i am generally less dodgy than most people tend to be in that area. My personality and behavior is usually rather static, regardless of circumstance. I'm not sure whether that is a good thing or a bad one though. I just know it's relatively uncommon overall.
As an unrelated thought: I've definitely begun to notice how much the absence of obligation and personal risk tends to show a person's true colors. People tend to only act a certain way out of circumstance, rather than personality... or rather circumstance just tends to have more of an influence than internal sources do. People are nice for a reason, and usually not for the right one. That's ok though. Given the circumstances, i should probably not give a shit. I'm gonna work on that... before it drives me crazy. I'm certainly no perfect exception to the ideas in the above paragraph, but i do think i am generally less dodgy than most people tend to be in that area. My personality and behavior is usually rather static, regardless of circumstance. I'm not sure whether that is a good thing or a bad one though. I just know it's relatively uncommon overall.