It's been twelve years...
I started this LJ in 2004 and I haven't posted since 2011. I forgot about it mostly and I grew out of my emo, must document every part of my life, phase. I miss writing though. I miss being part of a community that isn't about just doing some stupid shit in front of a camera and becoming famous. I love to write and I haven't had that passion for something in a long itme. I was always good at it and now I feel like I lost that. I don't know if I lost my passion or if I lost my talent but I lost something. I think I may have lost a part of my true self after all the bullshit I put myself through. So I suppose we will see. I just have to start writing, I have to get things out and I have to be able to get all of these thoughts out of my head. Ever since I started getting anxiety I am constantly thinking, constantly swirling thoughts in my brain, trying to quiet my fears and keep myself pushin but its hard when I am constantly second guessing every thought I have and every choice I make. I need to be better for me.