I don't know what this means or what to do with it.

[beautifulblu]

I rarely ever write on this thing anymore. Only reason I'm doing it now is I guess I don't want the facebook crowd to read it or my boyfriend and friends to ask questions, is that wrong?

I have this feeling of not wanting a lot of people around, feeling quite anti social. Like, I don't wanna talk to my boyfriend, I don't wanna be around my friends or talk to them or my family. All I wanna do is escape somewhere and just be alone. On the other hand I have a longing for people more like me. People with similar interests and me and my friends don't seem to have that.

Another very big problem is me and an old friend starting talking again and it appears that our feelings for each other we used to have seem to still be around. It's something I do my best to ignore and brush off but it is becoming ever so apparent that we are more compatible and interested in each other than we used to be. We're both in long term relationships and nothing would ever happen between us but it's still like an elephant in the room when ever we're talking. It's very unsettling, Especially when he's the only person I wanna talk to and be around. I do not like this.

I really hope this is some horrific crush that will pass in the next few weeks.