(no subject)
I never thought id be the one to become emotional over live journal. Im not usually the person who will reach out for advice or comfort over something that is so social. ive always loved to figure shit out on my own because thats really how it should be. Peoples opinions are just that. advice is only advice. its up to you to decipher the master plan. But i feel so lost right now. Ive havent been happy for weeks. Its just been disaster after disaster trolling through me mind. School, relationships, the future. Its all apparent, im well awear, but where is it all going. Theres so much shit to think about and its all so overwhelming that it seems almost worth it to huttle up in a corner to curl up and die. And its scary for me to think about this because i know that life is just going to get harder. I dont want to be a pawn in this game. I want to be the person whos moving the pawn. Theres so much to do to become that though. I got off to a late start in life when in come to being responsible about life altering decisions. And now im finally makeing things happen for myself and its seriously the hardest thing ive ever endured. I feel like Dougy Howser right now except nothing i say is enlightening. I sincerly apologize for this entry. Just hopeing i can get some good advise, about any aspect of this, from some smart people. I miss Starry. Jam fam.