Something Bigger Than Us
i have been unfortunate in these past days when it comes to knowing the safety of my extended friends and family. for the past ten days men and women in iran fighting for their right to live a life free of fascist regime have died by the hundreds. a sixteen year-old girl named Neda stood in a protest group and made her way between the riot police and protesting people and held them apart by the stretch of her arms, as a mean to say that violence is not the right answer. momentarily after she stood her ground, she was shot dead in the face, on camera. Neda could be you or me, or anyone close to us. It breaks my heart that people fail to see the delicacy of life and the ultimate and necessary need to love one another more than anything else. life is so fucking fragile and we all forget it. the anniversary of my grandfather's death was on father's day this year. my dad spent the whole day putting on a content face but i saw his misty, red eyes and heard the quiet sobs he released in his room upon waking up. my dad told me of the last time he saw his father. he was twenty years old and in the army, privately against government regime in iran. when the revolutionary war started, he had to flee the country in fear of being killed. even the pictures his parents had of him had to be burned so authorities could not identify him further. the day he left, he stood on his front door step and spoke to his father for the last time. his father begged him to stay, but my dad regrettingly told him, with tears dripping from his eyes, "dad, i'm sorry, have to go." that was their last embrace, thirty four years ago. with nothing more to say. so, i took the liberty to give him a card yesterday, announcing that he was my hero for as long as time exists. as his eyes scanned the writing, he could barely speak. for the first time in my life, i held my dad in MY arms and rubbed his back as he cried. i was finally returning the favor for all my childhood years when i scraped my knee, or got picked on at school, or just felt blue and needed him to comfort me. bottom line is, when you know who you want to make proud for the rest of your life, you want the rest of your life to begin as soon as possible. second story...today, i was at my cousin's house. he gifted his fiance a german shepard puppy, Maya, a month ago as a birthday gift. the most adorable, obedient, quiet, cutest puppy with the biggest paws in the books. upon my arrival, i played with Maya a little bit, letting her lick my salty fingers and petting her soft silky coat. an hour later, my cousin's fiance let Maya out. as she cleaned the inside of Maya's crate outside, she put Maya in their truckbed to lay down and chill. there i was, watching "is she really going out with him?" on mtv, when my cousin's fiance storms inside crying and screaming. my cousin sprints outside...i put down the remote and stand up, startled, and peer outside the front door. there, in front of my own eyes, was Maya, hung from the side of the truck...hung. like a person. immediately, i started crying hard and i mean HARD because i knew right then that that picture would never ever leave my mind for as long as i live. a one month old puppy, dead. playing with her, touching her, feeling her healthy heart beat, what had seemed like just seconds ago, and now, she was gone. spirit a-float. i'm still not over this. i'm still not over any of the saddness i've witnessed recently. i'm broken-hearted for oppressed, dead people on the streets in iran, for my dad, who never got to see his own father after that day, and for Maya, the precious puppy who i will never see again. i'm biting my lip, trying not to cry..but what's the use? things really show you how fragile life can be.