when it comes to four year old devon, eugene you are NOT the father1
ah maury... the pinnacle of high class. i truly hate my life. im not even watching maury. i can just hear it. i hate everything. and it smells like onions. and i hate everything. im gonna go drown my sorrows with a funny movie. or ill depress myself even more and watch la strada and hate the world even more. because it sucks. just like me. stupid two bit town..... i wish i was some trashy piece of maury worthy shit. my life would be so easy, just fighting with people and swearing in an odd indistinguishable southern/western accent. and then id get pregnant and not know which of the twelve guys i slept with in 1 day was "tha daddah." and then id go on maury 11 times without finding out which it was and on the last show, id find it was the 43 year old toothless truck driver named jethro from west virginia who smells not slightly of leeks and homophobia. and then id end up in an empty shell marriage in which jethro would have countless affairs while i lose my passion for life altogether and while completely aware of his affairs will act completely surprised when my obese friend with 5 kids and a crew cut tells me she saw jethro with debonique at the motel 6 over on route 7. but i really wouldn't really care because i wont care about anything. and then ill spend the rest of my days battling jethro until he leaves, discouraging my children from going to college, spending my money on cigarettes and dog food, and sipping coffee brandy in a lawn chair out front with my crew cut friend. if only i were that lucky.... but no... i actually have future. fuckin ay....