(no subject)
I am having anxiety attacks about tomorrow. My Second Patient Ever loved me, I think I've told you that. Last time I was in the clinic though, I was with the Third Patient Ever, and everything came crashing down. It was not pretty. I was thoroughly destroyed.
Without going into boring emo details, just know that I felt that instructor was picking nits and the whole situation was made worse by the general massive chaos in the faculty clinic and certain peers. I fully accept that I am stupid and inept, but please don't undermine and belittle me in front of my patient, especially during the first appointment.
I was on the verge of tears by 5 pm that day. No, I did not cry. No sense in wasting tears on people who don't matter.
...besides, I didn't really have time to be upset, because we had to write a micro test the following morning at 8 am.
Reading week and research day came and went. Two weeks without clinic were a relief, but really my nerves are all but calm about tomorrow. I just called the patient to confirm and my heart rate shot way up.
I blocked off this evening such that I can look up all the tutorials and clips I can find. I read her chart again on the electronic patient database. I am doing everything I can to prepare.
My grandmother says, if they are being super picky, shut them up by being even more picky than they are.
Being at the clinic feels like going through a minefield. Yeah, that's the kind of positive learning environment where we get our world class education.
Without going into boring emo details, just know that I felt that instructor was picking nits and the whole situation was made worse by the general massive chaos in the faculty clinic and certain peers. I fully accept that I am stupid and inept, but please don't undermine and belittle me in front of my patient, especially during the first appointment.
I was on the verge of tears by 5 pm that day. No, I did not cry. No sense in wasting tears on people who don't matter.
...besides, I didn't really have time to be upset, because we had to write a micro test the following morning at 8 am.
Reading week and research day came and went. Two weeks without clinic were a relief, but really my nerves are all but calm about tomorrow. I just called the patient to confirm and my heart rate shot way up.
I blocked off this evening such that I can look up all the tutorials and clips I can find. I read her chart again on the electronic patient database. I am doing everything I can to prepare.
My grandmother says, if they are being super picky, shut them up by being even more picky than they are.
Being at the clinic feels like going through a minefield. Yeah, that's the kind of positive learning environment where we get our world class education.