(no subject)
i find that already only two weeks into the shcool year and im slacking off. i dont take hw seriously and in general im too laid back. i know you need some level of laxness to get through jr yr and maybes its because the had crap hasnt started yet, but frankly i know what i need to do to wise up, but i still dont. i dont know its weird, i feeel like i wont change until something drastic happens and i get a huge slap in the face. but for now i supposei should eitehr change or stop whining about changing because being a dreamer just isnt enough sometimes.
aside from the whole school scene theres real life. i mean whatever constitutes as real in my little world anyway. theres my friends family and bf. friends = good, we dont see eachother a lot but i really appreciate them. sometimes i feel like im not on a level anymore where i can tell them anything since im different as if and they may subconciously judge me, but even if i cant fully talk to them theyre wonderful people. my family on the other hand is rocky. most of the time i avoid being home as often as possible. its not like they make me feel like crap contstantly, but were always fighting and if were not were not doing much of anything because we have no relationship. then again my parents do get some snaps since theyve been giving me more freedom lately. buts as spidermans uncle says "with great power comes great responsibility" and i dont wnat to fuck up my new power and they become completely anal with me, so now theres added pressure. almost like theyve laid off me but now im laying it on myself hmmm. then theres jason. for all of you who didnt know (since i dont call throughout the halls about us) we decided to stay together even though hes at college. which made a lot of sense at the time, but both of us underestimated how much it sucks to have a long distance relationship. its just really hard, and really sad. he visted the past weekend which was amazing, but still.... i dont know it just sucks.
well i suppose thats a brief update on my life for those of us who havent talked in a while. sorry this enrty was a complete and total whine entry but its been a hwile since ive updated.
ps. yay for getting int o moon over buffalo
pps. yay for being done with drivers ed classes and only needing the on the road hrs (which are all schedualed at the beginning of oct so twill be done by oct 9)
th th th th th th th thats all folks :::cue music:::
aside from the whole school scene theres real life. i mean whatever constitutes as real in my little world anyway. theres my friends family and bf. friends = good, we dont see eachother a lot but i really appreciate them. sometimes i feel like im not on a level anymore where i can tell them anything since im different as if and they may subconciously judge me, but even if i cant fully talk to them theyre wonderful people. my family on the other hand is rocky. most of the time i avoid being home as often as possible. its not like they make me feel like crap contstantly, but were always fighting and if were not were not doing much of anything because we have no relationship. then again my parents do get some snaps since theyve been giving me more freedom lately. buts as spidermans uncle says "with great power comes great responsibility" and i dont wnat to fuck up my new power and they become completely anal with me, so now theres added pressure. almost like theyve laid off me but now im laying it on myself hmmm. then theres jason. for all of you who didnt know (since i dont call throughout the halls about us) we decided to stay together even though hes at college. which made a lot of sense at the time, but both of us underestimated how much it sucks to have a long distance relationship. its just really hard, and really sad. he visted the past weekend which was amazing, but still.... i dont know it just sucks.
well i suppose thats a brief update on my life for those of us who havent talked in a while. sorry this enrty was a complete and total whine entry but its been a hwile since ive updated.
ps. yay for getting int o moon over buffalo
pps. yay for being done with drivers ed classes and only needing the on the road hrs (which are all schedualed at the beginning of oct so twill be done by oct 9)
th th th th th th th thats all folks :::cue music:::