in which existentialists do it pointlessly
Lately the old "what the eff am I going to do w/ my life" worries have resurfaced, b/c I've been so stressed about school. I often find myself thinking things like "a lot of people who don't go to college have fine jobs that they're happy with" or "why don't I just get a poli sci major like everyone else, easy peasy."
Granted I give myself these existential crises fairly regularly, but the truth is that I chose my major based on the fact that I found high school chemistry easy and fun, and that I had half a crush on my chem teacher. Most people have an idea of what the job they want to do is, and then they go to school and learn how to do that job. I have no idea what sorts of jobs are available in my field, or even if I want any of them. If I could balance equations for the rest of my life or solve stoichiometry problems, sign me the fuck up. But I'm not one of your creative types - I don't plan to change anything or come up w/ some new science, or mix two chemicals no one ever mixed before. People give me more credit than I'm due - I'm not that kind of smart. If you tell me what to do, I'll do it better than anyone, but I can't come up w/ it on my own.
And I don't want to waste the next three to four years earning a degree I won't be happy with. The problem is the earlier point of actually knowing what job - or even what kind of job - I want to do for the rest of my life. The only career I've ever imagined myself being really happy going to day after day after day is copy editing at a newspaper or magazine, using my neurotic need for flawless spelling and grammar and my mad red-pen skills for the greater good. I just don't know how to get there - and I still want to learn more about chemistry, and anthropology, and astrophysics.
In summary: BLAH BLAH MY LIFE IS SO HARD BLAH CRISIS ABOUT MY FUTURE BLAH BLAH MY PROBLEMS ARE IMPORTANT.
Granted I give myself these existential crises fairly regularly, but the truth is that I chose my major based on the fact that I found high school chemistry easy and fun, and that I had half a crush on my chem teacher. Most people have an idea of what the job they want to do is, and then they go to school and learn how to do that job. I have no idea what sorts of jobs are available in my field, or even if I want any of them. If I could balance equations for the rest of my life or solve stoichiometry problems, sign me the fuck up. But I'm not one of your creative types - I don't plan to change anything or come up w/ some new science, or mix two chemicals no one ever mixed before. People give me more credit than I'm due - I'm not that kind of smart. If you tell me what to do, I'll do it better than anyone, but I can't come up w/ it on my own.
And I don't want to waste the next three to four years earning a degree I won't be happy with. The problem is the earlier point of actually knowing what job - or even what kind of job - I want to do for the rest of my life. The only career I've ever imagined myself being really happy going to day after day after day is copy editing at a newspaper or magazine, using my neurotic need for flawless spelling and grammar and my mad red-pen skills for the greater good. I just don't know how to get there - and I still want to learn more about chemistry, and anthropology, and astrophysics.
In summary: BLAH BLAH MY LIFE IS SO HARD BLAH CRISIS ABOUT MY FUTURE BLAH BLAH MY PROBLEMS ARE IMPORTANT.