ooooh
Just spent the last 24-hours being really kinda sickly...I must have had a bug or eaten wrong or SOMETHING, but whatever it was, my body wanted it OUT OF THE SYSTEM, at whatever cost. So you can imagine me aright. Feel sad, though - I would have seen Gareth yesterday, had it not been for me getting so sick. And he's leaving today - ah, vell. Life will never defeat me.
School tomorrow, meaning that I should make sure my math's done. Also lots of review for the midterms at the end of the month - when my dearest is returning, for JOY! I'll wait none too patiently for that moment, mark my words.
And speaking of such...
I suppose I might as well write down my thoughts, to better organize them. When he asked me if I would be happy making out in the back of the library every couple of months, I could hear two voices in my head - What else can we do? and There's more to this than kissing, Mhuir. And that, more than anything else, inspired doubt within me. So many difficulties in maintaining a long-distance relationship. Rarely seeing each other, being so busy, and the age difference. I've still yet to see life's cruelest side, while he is barely getting through it now. When college is finished chewing him up, it will spit him out into the "Real World" whilst I'm still getting screwed over in college. And during that time - who knows? I may even be farther from him then. In Maine, in New York, in Ireland. And there's every chance that one or both of us will find another whom we deeply love, and would have an easier relationship with. If so, could we still remian friends? Who knows?
Despite the difficulties, I'm not one to give up before I start. Though it will be trying, I think that if we can make it last through these harrowing years, we can make it last through anything. To hell with the danger; I laugh in its face. My decision is made, and my eyes are set. I want to do this, and I will fight to the death to make it work. And in the end if I must admit defeat, I shall do so with grace and pride, standing on my feet in all honor.
But let us hope it shall not come to that.
School tomorrow, meaning that I should make sure my math's done. Also lots of review for the midterms at the end of the month - when my dearest is returning, for JOY! I'll wait none too patiently for that moment, mark my words.
And speaking of such...
I suppose I might as well write down my thoughts, to better organize them. When he asked me if I would be happy making out in the back of the library every couple of months, I could hear two voices in my head - What else can we do? and There's more to this than kissing, Mhuir. And that, more than anything else, inspired doubt within me. So many difficulties in maintaining a long-distance relationship. Rarely seeing each other, being so busy, and the age difference. I've still yet to see life's cruelest side, while he is barely getting through it now. When college is finished chewing him up, it will spit him out into the "Real World" whilst I'm still getting screwed over in college. And during that time - who knows? I may even be farther from him then. In Maine, in New York, in Ireland. And there's every chance that one or both of us will find another whom we deeply love, and would have an easier relationship with. If so, could we still remian friends? Who knows?
Despite the difficulties, I'm not one to give up before I start. Though it will be trying, I think that if we can make it last through these harrowing years, we can make it last through anything. To hell with the danger; I laugh in its face. My decision is made, and my eyes are set. I want to do this, and I will fight to the death to make it work. And in the end if I must admit defeat, I shall do so with grace and pride, standing on my feet in all honor.
But let us hope it shall not come to that.