Fic SGA: Checkmate: The Road Home pt 4: Taking the Plunge
Title: The Road Home, part 4: Taking the Plunge
Series:Checkmate ‘Verse
Author: Beadattitude
Pairing: John/Rodney
Rating: PG
Beta: sheafrotherdon, who whittled me down when I ran too wordy, and who has my deepest thanks ( Read more... )
Series:Checkmate ‘Verse
Author: Beadattitude
Pairing: John/Rodney
Rating: PG
Beta: sheafrotherdon, who whittled me down when I ran too wordy, and who has my deepest thanks ( Read more... )
:-)
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Damn, that's the first time THAT's ever happened.
:D
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That was just *adorable* and lovely. It's sooo right that John calls his team *family* and that they tell each other what they mean to one another!
My absolute favourite lines:
John's voice was strong, if slightly choked. “Brilliant. Generous. Patient." John swayed slightly, but kept his eyes locked on Rodney. “I trust him. Rodney has my heart.”
and
"You... of course you have mine, too!" Rodney flustered, a lump in his throat. "Are you blind?"
*squishes the boys* They are just so schmoopy together! :-)
Wee fixes:
'Ronon Dex on his last visit to made an accurate comparison' ... 'make'
'or not speak as as he chose' ... remove an 'as'
'and nodded or murmuring in reply' ... 'murmured'?
but sank just inches too short.” ... remove the quote mark
'walking carefully in his long robe' ... needs a period
“You must not go until you are called Rodney McKay,” ... period not comma?
"Just checking" ... needs a period
"You... you know. I did." ... 'you know I did'
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I'm so glad you enjoyed it! Thank you very much for your sweet words; I really appreciate them.
Along those lines, could you send the fixes to me at beadtific at gmail dot com in the future? On days, especially as tired as I am, the constructive part of the criticism gets kind of lost and I feel all shlumpy. I should be less of a baby about it, but I've had six hours of solid sleep in the last two days. Thank you for having my back, though.
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Please don't feel shlumpy! This series has been absolutely wonderful, feel good stuff, that I read and re-read whenever I want a morale boost. It's absolutely wonderful!
It's all the little touches you put in that flesh out these characters in so many ways. Ronon letting slip that he had six older sisters and *that's* why his hair's the way it is. The villager ladies ogling Rodney in order to make him leave! Sooo funny! And true. Ronon telling Rodney that it is all going to be ok because he's seen John being *happy* for the past month and John's happiness made Rodney happy too. Rodney's freak out when John couldn't get the words out the first time! Spot on! :-)
And I could go on and on and on. And I've pored over each chapter you've produced oohing and aahing over how fabulous it all was. So, seriously, cheer up and enjoy all the great feedback you've got so far and will keep on getting.
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I'm so glad you love the story, and really, really appreciate your support and help ::smishes you::
Ronon's sisters captured him and did it before he went to his first military camp because he had this gorgeous, naturally curly hair and it made them sick to think they would cut it all off. So they dreaded it, and later, everyone thought he was so cool he kept it. Hee.
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