where to begin...
Wow. i really dont even know where to start. i think i will start with last nights occurrences.
I cant even begin to describe how i felt after a certain situation. I guess im just shocked at how horrible people can be and how they have no fucken regard for other peoples feelings. It sucks, yet it is kinda interesting, that in order to make themselves happy, some people have to put others down. Are they just that unsatisfied/insecure with themselves that they feel the need to try and make people feel like shit to get a laugh or in some fucked up and crazy way make them feel happy? I guess i just dont understand what runs through peoples minds in situations like that, but im glad i dont. No one is perfect, and we are all guilty of saying one mean thing or another about a person-->but i have never been the type of person who takes pride in putting others down. If i see that one of my friends is hurt, or is in terrible trouble, i have ALWAYS been there for them-no matter what. I NEVER like to see people sad; and i guess the fact that there are people in this world who take comfort in that type of shit is what saddens me the most. I dont know really know what to say. I dont know what situation caused that all to happen last night, since i know i havent done a damn thing to any of the parties involved recently considering i havent talked to them in months, but whatever. its fine. Just thank you to those who actually DID CARE and said sorry that it happened in the first place. i actually do appreciate it and it means a lot to me.
Another thing that has really hurt me recently is to hear that one of my old best friends--a girl i used to dance at a studio with and a girl who really helped me open up in life--has been addicted to a horrible drug for over a year now. She is such an awesome person and to now hear that she is having such problems hurts so bad. I talked to her today and she let me know that she is going through NA meetings, etc, but she wont listen to me when i tell her that an in-patient program is the best thing she can do for herself. All i can do is pray for her but i promise on anything that if she relapses that i will totally turn her in to someone. i love her too much to see her fuck up her life even more than she has in the past year.
Well on a lighter note. Things with my boyfriend are incredible. He is such an awesome person and treats me so good. We are just past being a month official and things are strong and getting stronger. Im close with his family....his little sister says im like a sister to her!!! *AWWW!!!!*She was so mean to me at first too so im sooo happy she likes me now!!!<--she is the LITTLE sister i never had :) oh and to my amazement-he is the first guy my dad has actually talked to and seems to like. *yay!* and of course everyone else in my family likes him too. My niece LOVES him.
Work is good. Angel season slowly coming to an end and im soooo sad about it. Its been fun though!!! Should be getting back into the swing of things at LS again.....oooohhh fun....its good though-i will be making actual money again...last time i cocktailed i did really good tip wise so yay!!!
School sucks. Uggghhhh. My classes are good but wow! sooooooo much homework im going crazy! my one comm. class gives like 6 papers to write every week. Shes nuts! But on a good note that same teacher says i have good "news writing instincts!" thats cool i guess....but i dont want to write news stories!
Family is spectacular. Cant remember the last time i argued with my parents. Maybe they are actually realizing that i have EXACTLY 3 months til im 21. Woooo hoooo!!!
Friends are fantastic. Couldnt ask for better friends than i have right now. yay!
Other than that i dont know what to say. Have a good one :)
I cant even begin to describe how i felt after a certain situation. I guess im just shocked at how horrible people can be and how they have no fucken regard for other peoples feelings. It sucks, yet it is kinda interesting, that in order to make themselves happy, some people have to put others down. Are they just that unsatisfied/insecure with themselves that they feel the need to try and make people feel like shit to get a laugh or in some fucked up and crazy way make them feel happy? I guess i just dont understand what runs through peoples minds in situations like that, but im glad i dont. No one is perfect, and we are all guilty of saying one mean thing or another about a person-->but i have never been the type of person who takes pride in putting others down. If i see that one of my friends is hurt, or is in terrible trouble, i have ALWAYS been there for them-no matter what. I NEVER like to see people sad; and i guess the fact that there are people in this world who take comfort in that type of shit is what saddens me the most. I dont know really know what to say. I dont know what situation caused that all to happen last night, since i know i havent done a damn thing to any of the parties involved recently considering i havent talked to them in months, but whatever. its fine. Just thank you to those who actually DID CARE and said sorry that it happened in the first place. i actually do appreciate it and it means a lot to me.
Another thing that has really hurt me recently is to hear that one of my old best friends--a girl i used to dance at a studio with and a girl who really helped me open up in life--has been addicted to a horrible drug for over a year now. She is such an awesome person and to now hear that she is having such problems hurts so bad. I talked to her today and she let me know that she is going through NA meetings, etc, but she wont listen to me when i tell her that an in-patient program is the best thing she can do for herself. All i can do is pray for her but i promise on anything that if she relapses that i will totally turn her in to someone. i love her too much to see her fuck up her life even more than she has in the past year.
Well on a lighter note. Things with my boyfriend are incredible. He is such an awesome person and treats me so good. We are just past being a month official and things are strong and getting stronger. Im close with his family....his little sister says im like a sister to her!!! *AWWW!!!!*She was so mean to me at first too so im sooo happy she likes me now!!!<--she is the LITTLE sister i never had :) oh and to my amazement-he is the first guy my dad has actually talked to and seems to like. *yay!* and of course everyone else in my family likes him too. My niece LOVES him.
Work is good. Angel season slowly coming to an end and im soooo sad about it. Its been fun though!!! Should be getting back into the swing of things at LS again.....oooohhh fun....its good though-i will be making actual money again...last time i cocktailed i did really good tip wise so yay!!!
School sucks. Uggghhhh. My classes are good but wow! sooooooo much homework im going crazy! my one comm. class gives like 6 papers to write every week. Shes nuts! But on a good note that same teacher says i have good "news writing instincts!" thats cool i guess....but i dont want to write news stories!
Family is spectacular. Cant remember the last time i argued with my parents. Maybe they are actually realizing that i have EXACTLY 3 months til im 21. Woooo hoooo!!!
Friends are fantastic. Couldnt ask for better friends than i have right now. yay!
Other than that i dont know what to say. Have a good one :)