(no subject)
I guess reality doesn't really hit for a while...? We were all going through pictures last night and my grandma Grace was in there a bunch of times and i just stared at her pictures, i miss her so much:( I guess it hasn't hit because my aunt's been in the hospital for almost 14 days so i haven't gone to her condo to see her, and not see my grandma there. I want to cry right now because i'm thinking about it... tomorrow is my grandma loni's services in royal oak at the sullivan funeral home.. I hate funeral homes they're so creepy... I don't want to go, i don't want to see her laying there gone. My grandpa, i feel so terrible whenever i see him.. he just looks so sad, he's been drinking more than he use to before which is a lot. it only numbs the pain. He can't even talk about her or he gets choked up. tonight i went and sat on the couch we were all watching daddy day care, and he puts his arm around me and pulls me toward him and holds my hand, i can't even imagine how losing someone you spent 50 years of your life with would be like...
I know i have to get my shit together with everything/everyone. My new years resolution:I WON'T...AGAIN.. WONT, HAVE PEOPLE TREAT ME LIKE SHIT. Never is never and that's never again. Ann and I had a good talk about someone tonight, oh man she reads my mind! I look at it this way, you can't really love somebody if all you do is want to fight with them and be mean. That's not love darlin', it's just not.
"Scars heal, glory fades, and all we're left with are the memories made. Pain hurts, but only for a minute, your life is short so go on and live it"
it may take time but i'll heal, i'm sick of hurting and being hurt. People can be so cruel.. ok well SOMEONE can be, and i'm just tired of it. if everyone only knew what i was talking about, you'd probably be sick yourself..
Anyways i'm going to sleep, my brother is probably already sleeping in my bed! grrrrr "court when are you comin to bed"? hahaha.... night
I know i have to get my shit together with everything/everyone. My new years resolution:I WON'T...AGAIN.. WONT, HAVE PEOPLE TREAT ME LIKE SHIT. Never is never and that's never again. Ann and I had a good talk about someone tonight, oh man she reads my mind! I look at it this way, you can't really love somebody if all you do is want to fight with them and be mean. That's not love darlin', it's just not.
"Scars heal, glory fades, and all we're left with are the memories made. Pain hurts, but only for a minute, your life is short so go on and live it"
it may take time but i'll heal, i'm sick of hurting and being hurt. People can be so cruel.. ok well SOMEONE can be, and i'm just tired of it. if everyone only knew what i was talking about, you'd probably be sick yourself..
Anyways i'm going to sleep, my brother is probably already sleeping in my bed! grrrrr "court when are you comin to bed"? hahaha.... night